Monday, April 30, 2007

Dragon Boat Woes: Chapter III?

We may have to do these on a weekly basis, or at least as we see fit to do updates.

While no sinking may have gone down yesterday during training, a new member of the team joined - Horace who was drilled in the ways of being "the man at the helm".

Pandy's account is as follows:

Or 2: How goes it today, Stupendous Man?

Pandy: training was rough. Horace was the one to take a dive for the team today

Or 2: he didn't sink the boat, did he?

Pandy: no, he saved us all by sacrificing himself

Or 2: because that's the kind of thing I'd expect from him. ahahahaha. Yeah, that's much like him too. Should have kicked MC out the boat to save everyone, is what SM should have done

Pandy: lol! MC didn't sink us today but his side of the boat was riding pretty low in the water :)

Or 2: because one side of lopsided assback is longer than the next, I told you. Anyway, watching Sopranos?

Pandy: he he he, nah, trying to figure out where we ran into problems today

Or 2: ha. very nice. Don't forget to strongly consider the lopsided assback

Pandy: he he he, will do.

And today, MC's account of yesterday's events:

Or 2: I hear Horace took one for the team yesterday? now HE's a Jack Bauer

MC: Ha far from. He's a Tony Almeda

Or 2: the true hero of the show?

MC: Almost took us to Tobago. Hell No. Dead ass Tony. We didn't sink yesterday, but then again Pandy wasn't on the boat much. hmmmmmm

Or 2: I told you to paddle to Tobago. Jazz Festival was on. Oh, is that the story?

MC: Horace was taking us there..trust me. He was at the helm and next thing we knew, we were in the middle of the Ocean

Or 2: ahahahahahaahahahahaha

MC: I was like "Oh no". "Not again"

Or 2: hahahahaha. "at least it wasn't me this time". ?. What is this dragon boat training for, exactly?

MC: The dragon boat racing competition in June. Where we race against other teams. Its an annual event. We're the Sea Spartans. We plan to have red capes and speedos.

... ah, goo'd times.

And now for a final word from Pandy for today -

Pandy: ...well, all you missed was when Horace took one for the team after MC started to rock the boat from left to right. There's actually some video footage which Horace will try to upload. Don't want to sell anyone out but if u slow it down to 1/8 speed see if u see anyone paddling air :P

And so we await the video footage. The Dragon Boat Incident: Chapter IV is pending.


Quote of today from H1: If I were in Trinidad still, I would join the Dragon Boat team. I wouldn't join Pandy's Dragon Boat, I'd join another team. There wouldn't be as many laughs but at least I'd be dry. And winning.

The Chinese MIGHT Save This Show

The 24 HC Continues

1 AM to 2 AM:

The Chinese = best cursing sequence eva'.

Lisa = whore

VP = creepy, scary man who loves him some blondes, including Karen Hayes?

Nadia = bitch we'd like to see get her ass handed to her in the very near future...like in two minutes

Horlicks = a drink with a conscience? But oh, not listening to Jack Bauer. Jack will pay you back for that. So watch your milky ass!

Audrey = dazed and confused because her NBC show got cancelled only to be dropped in a show that's losing its fans fast.

Chloe crying in the corner = a broken-hearted Or 2.

Ok, the line for tonight from The Sec. of Defense: Jack, you are a curse.

And my line for tonight's episode: That Audrey/Jack Sleeping Beauty scene was vomit worthy. He should have just sired her and be done with the whole thing.

Audrey Confused Count = 5 scenes

Head Count = 0.

Saturday, April 28, 2007

The Evolution of SF

SF ----> SAF ----> Frass

Where Have All The Bees Gone?

Vanishing honeybees mystify scientists

POSTED: 0140 GMT (0940 HKT), April 22, 2007

Story Highlights

• Billions of bees have mysteriously vanished since late last year in the U.S.
• Disappearing bees have also been reported in Europe and Brazil
• One-third of the U.S. diet depends on pollination, mostly by honeybees
• Some beekeepers are losing 50 percent of their bees to the disorder

WASHINGTON (Reuters) -- Go to work, come home.

Go to work, come home.

Go to work -- and vanish without a trace.

Billions of bees have done just that, leaving the crop fields they are supposed to pollinate, and scientists are mystified about why.

The phenomenon was first noticed late last year in the United States, where honeybees are used to pollinate $15 billion worth of fruits, nuts and other crops annually. Disappearing bees have also been reported in Europe and Brazil.

Commercial beekeepers would set their bees near a crop field as usual and come back in two or three weeks to find the hives bereft of foraging worker bees, with only the queen and the immature insects remaining. Whatever worker bees survived were often too weak to perform their tasks.

If the bees were dying of pesticide poisoning or freezing, their bodies would be expected to lie around the hive. And if they were absconding because of some threat -- which they have been known to do -- they wouldn't leave without the queen.

Copyright 2007 Reuters. All rights reserved.

H1 and I figure they've gone here, most likely:

Scientists find most Earth-like planet yet
POSTED: 11:58 a.m. EDT, April 26, 2007

Story Highlights
• NEW: Planet could conceivably house life outside our solar system
• NEW: Discovery a "significant step" on way to finding possible life in universe
• NEW: Planet, dubbed 581 c, orbits red dwarf star Gliese 581
• NEW: Newly found planet full of liquid water, scientist believes

WASHINGTON (AP) -- European astronomers have found the most Earth-like planet outside our solar system, and here's what it might be like to live there:

The "sun" wouldn't burn brightly. It would hang close, large and red in the sky, glowing faintly like a charcoal ember. And it probably would never set if you lived on the sunny side of the planet.

You could have a birthday party every 13 days because that's how fast this new planet circles its sun-like star. But watch the cake -- you'd weigh a whole lot more than you do on Earth. (Learn more about exoplanets)

You might be able to keep your current wardrobe. The temperature in this alien setting will likely be a lot like Earth's -- not too hot, not too cold.


Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.

Notes on this:

1. This new planet probably has bloggers and scientists talking smack about us right now.

2. The bees are probably absconding from a threat - yeah, it's called the Queen! That's why she's there without her slaves!

3. Awww, my bees.



H1, Have You Anything To Say?

Bones of prehistoric camel found at Wal-Mart site

PHOENIX, Arizona (AP) -- Workers digging at the site of a future Wal-Mart store in suburban Mesa have unearthed the bones of a prehistoric camel that's estimated to be about 10,000 years old.

Arizona State University geology museum curator Brad Archer hurried out to the site Friday when he got the news that the owner of a nursery was carefully excavating bones found at the bottom of a hole being dug for a new ornamental citrus tree.

"There's no question that this is a camel; these creatures walked the land here until about 8,000 years ago, when the same event that wiped out a great deal of mammal life took place," Archer told The Arizona Republic.

Wal-Mart officials and Greenfield Citrus Nursery owner John Babiarz have already agreed that the bones will go directly on display at ASU.

Archer said some of them may be placed on display very soon, but most will take several months "to get sorted out and stabilized."

"In my 15 years at ASU doing this work I can think of six or seven times when finds this important have been made," Archer said. "This is the first camel. Others have been horses, once a mammoth on Happy Valley Road. This sort of thing is extremely rare."


Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.

Eenteresting...

I've A Secret To Tell You, TD5!

Apparently, I have a guilty-pleasure album. I don't think I've any business liking Klaxons but I kind of do. I admit it! And it's shameful. That's my early review.

As for The Fratellis...they're fun but I can't really focus on them too much. I'll have to give them a better spin a few more times. So far, my impression is that they can get annoying. Fun but annoying. You know how I feel about too many 'la la la -s' and other type noises in a song and they're that kind of band. It brings back memories of those stupid Kaiser Chiefs...

Okay.

I'm well aware that it's no secret once it goes on the blog but you other baka shouldn't judge me.

Friday, April 27, 2007

Bleach Weekly - 123

There's not much to say this week as Beetchie and I agree that the episode was very much all over the place this week.

So in choosing a topic, I'm going with the hotties this week in the Bleach Universe -
The "Super" Hiyori Machine!


And Ichigo "training" on the machine.

Shinji's tongue ring!



And Shinji. Still the new love of my life and the kind of boy you just don't mess with when things get serious.



Ichigo's Hollow!



I know, Beetchie, you don't really care for him in this form but I still like his crazy white ass.

Here's some food for thought that Beetchie and I have been wondering about:

1. Now, when people go to train, is it the same desert space? Is it one huge desert that Urahara, Yourichi, and the Vizards all share? And is it in Soul Society because SS looks lik ea total wasteland for the most part...

And finally, that frickin' Omake chapter cracked me the hell up. When the soul mod capsule and Kon's 'perfecto' plushie body hit Yachiru's head...I couldn't stop laughing and I'm still laughing right now just thinking about it.

Kon Abuse Sighting: 1 scene

A Story About X

Most people want to go to Africa to help the children.

X wants to go to Africa...for their wine country.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

That's It.

I am in love with Alex Turner.

Currently listening to: Favourite Worst Nightmare by Arctic Monkeys.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Omg. I AM Seishirou!!!!!

You are like Seishirou Sakurazuka from Tokyo Babylon and X. Um... that's scary. People who do not know you very well may very well think that you are a kind and gentle soul - someone who loves animals and cares about the environment. But really, you probably couldn't care less. Your true nature is that you are a bit obsessive and antisocial. And maybe a bit of a stalker. And all of this would be a bad thing... if you weren't so damn cool.



source: www.quizfarm.com :: Who Is Your Inner CLAMP Character?

But notice, I AM a cool kid. Ignore the blood.

And it turns out that H1 is also like Seishirou, minus the stalking bit.


- Or 2.

Monday, April 23, 2007

The Dragon Boat Incident: Chapter II

We have gathered evidence to try to shed some light on the Dragon Boat Incident of 04/22/07.

A source, (reliable and unbiased, honestly!), sent us photographs of what really happened. The pictures do not lie.

Photographic Evidence 1, otherwise known as "The Happy, Pretty-Dry Times":



Please notice how the beloved Dragon Boat is just moving right along there - it's the sun, the sea, the sky and the Dragon Boat.

Photographic Evidence 2, referred to now as "What is that? The First Signs of Trouble? Is that Frantic Paddling and a Low Boat, maybe?":



Photographic Evidence 3, or the "That's Definite Trouble! The Man in Front isn't there anymore!" shot:



And finally, Photographic Evidence 4:



It looks a whole lot like this - We've crashed. We've burned. We've tilted, not capsized. We're not in any mortal danger and the water is clearly shallow enough that we can stand in it.

H1 and I don't see any Jack Bauerism type heroism going down, MC.

Nor do we see any hottie 18 year olds, Pandy.

Still, this story has been nominated for The HOchies 2007 award in "The Hal Hal Moment" of the year category.

The other entries are pending but it's only April. You betches are too hilarious to not give us anymore gems for the year.

This is going to be hard to top but we look forward to all your insanity.

A Continuation of the Stupid Season

But maybe the Chinese can save this show. Maybe.

****SPOILERS****

The S6 24 HC Continues

12 AM to 1 AM:

If I saw some Horlicks in the street, I'd totally stop and pick it up! I do enjoy how this Horlicks admits he's screwed up.

Ahahaha, I was waiting for it: Jack Bauer's gone rogue. Yeah people, like you're really going to take down Jack Bauer.

Ooo, Bill is smart. He made sure to ask Chloe if she was trustworthy and would assist in helping find Jack.

Do you think Powers Boothe would feed Tom Lennox and Karen Hayes to some pIgs?

Ewwwwww. Lisa and VP Daniels should be fed to the pIgs! That's just nasty!

Ahahahahahahaha. Okay, Horlicks is on a roll today. He figured out where Jack was headed like a dog. "He went east!" Yep. He figured it out from tire tracks. Sniff him out, Horlicks!

"My ex-wife is suddenly showing signs of irrational behaviour." - Morris. Oh yes. Chloe is back. But awwwww, why'd you make Morris feel so bad! Low blow reminding him about the arming of the nuke. Low. Blow.

Who's this Peter? A new token, that's who! Ah, he's going to die like all tokens in this show.

Also, I am enjoying this back and forth between Tom and Karen about Bill. It's about time CTU had somebody else running it. Bill had a pretty long run there. It definitely means though that Karen and Bill's marriage is ova'!!!!

Awww, Jack Bauer said a heartfelt goo'day to Bill...you know what that means, Bill is definitely out of hya.

Bill WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. Noooooooooooooooooooo. =(

Um, I love how the Chinese badass told Audrey to get her ass over nyo in Chinese and Audrey understood.

Who I'd like to see dead in the near future: Nadia!

Audrey dazed count: 3 scenes

Head Count: 6. Ok, how did that rocket launcher hit that helicopter and yet miss? I know. It doesn't make sense to me either.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Bleach Weekly - 122!

***These may not be up anymore (stop cheering people who don't care) due to YouTube issues which I really do not want to get into right now.***

This week on Bleach - Cute but Wrong!

Urahara, cute and wrong:



Hitsugaya, cute (look at him all texting his report to Soul Society - those SS betches got all the modern technology and then some):



Rangiku...need I say, wrong?:



Shinji! The new love of my life is very cute but these scenes and what happened to him, talk about wrong!:











But yeah, that was pretty damned hilarious.

Kon Abuse Sighting: 0.5 of a scene. He got away by hiding under the covers. Nicely done, Kon. Nicely done.
However, Kon abuse in Hanataro's body: 1 scene. Kenpachi is so going to wail on him...

The Dragon Boat Incident

I'm just going to have to post the conversation. It's classic stuff this:

Or 2: what are you doing today?

MC: Oh relaxing now, Had dragon boat training this morning, when Pandy capsized the boat

Or 2: Are you sure Pandy capsized the boat?

MC: Well maybe not capsized, but we did sink and had to swim to shore, thanks to Pandy

Or 2: hahaha, I don't know if I believe this story

MC: Had to get Jack Bauer and rescue everyone on da boat

Or 2: you went Jack Bauer on their asses?

MC: Well maybe not the rescue bit, but it was Pandy's fault that we sank....or at least I blame him

Or 2: well there are only two things Jack Bauer does - rescue and interrogate
soo..
if you didn't rescue...how did the sinking go down?
and...where's the dragon boat?

MC: Well there was the first time when the boat rocked violently and Pandy took a dive for the team, he had a poor entry, so I gave him a 6.5.
The second time, he decided to take us all with him.
Before you know it, 3 people were overboard and people were screaming for help, so I had to jump into action and rescue all the ladies.

Then the boat started taking in water and then we were all trying to salvage paddles, look out for drowners and swim to shore. All this while Mish sits down on shore taking pictures. We practice down in Chagaramus, now I think I may have cholera from the damn dirty sea water.

Or 2: Ew. Goodness knows I've pooped in there are a few times. hahahaha. That is an awesome story

MC: Thanks Ho. Of course its a little more salacious and I'm the hero in my account. Pandy may say otherwise but this is my truth and I'm sticking to it.

Friday, April 20, 2007

You know who's Hot Fuzz?

Simon Pegg

Nick Frost

Kate Beckinsale

Becks

Gary Dourdan

Roger Moore

Randy Marsh


Check back for more...

They make you want to dig them out

There is a reason that the HOchies do not watch NUMB3RS. All the actors nya are hard on the eyes.

The 2nd Nominee for Ass of the Year Award

Who knew that James Blunt was not only an asshole but a stupid one at that?

Who leaves a model (who lost her boyfriend in the Tsunami), first to skank it up with a fire crotch, and now for that crabby crotch disease monger?

A stupid asshole. That's who.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Fare Thee Well, Sanjaya

Sanjaya, you Stupid Ass, now we have to put up with American Idol for at least another ten seasons. Thanks. Thanks.

Quote of the Night, on this:

"There will be a lot of crying little girls tonight....including SAF." - MC.

Currently listening to: H1's wailing.

We guess people can finally start eating again. Weak.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Don't These Itunes Bitches Know That...?

I am the Queen?

And I want to download the Arctic Monkeys?!

No one screws the Queen!

This Day Might Turn Out Bad

You know it just may be a bad day when you wake up in the morning, after having missed work for 2.5 days due to a dentist appointment from hell and basement flooding, look in the mirror and realize your hair looks a lot like Vayne Solidor's...



::sigh::

Yeah, it's going to be a loooonngg day.

Monday, April 16, 2007

"I Give You My Word"

Ah the Hollow words of Jack Bauer.

The S6 HC of 24 Continues.

11PM to 12 AM:

I don't know who Horlicks thinks he is trying to talk to Jack Bauer like that but I do like to see that Chloe's back! And as much a bitch as ever! Ah, let us remember the goo'd ol' days for a moment in the before time with the pre-taser shot.



Yeah. Yeah...

Seriously, Horlicks and his insubordination will lead to two things 1. either he falls in line and ends up being Jack Bauer's bitch like everyone else or 2. he ends up on the headcount much like Curtis did for going against Jack.

The bottomline? Be Jack Bauer's Bitch or die!

Anyway, what is up with Audrey and her constant blinking? At least she's not crying because then I'd have to bring back that old cry count. I guess being on the Nine made her tough or something like that.

"An asshole in Deadwood and an asshole in 24! He didn't like strong women in Deadwood either but he did like him some little blonde bitches." - H1, on VP Daniels.

MC, you're so not going to be happy with JB. He brought up the Curtis talk and about how he did what he had to. H1 has pointed out that he did what he WANTED to and killed his old friend because Curtis wasn't Jack's bitch anymore.

If the White House isn't Jack Bauer's bitch, then yeah he can go against it. Stupid Horlicks...

Head Count: 0. Although Wayne Palmer is half dead.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Two Messes

We were watching the Brit awards and let us just say to TD5,

Amy Winehouse is a hot damned mess. That's not what we really wanted to say because that's been pretty well-established already but you know when Joss Stone did her style, we hated it then and we hate it now still. Winehouse should stop trying to bring it back.

The other mess is Joss Stone, who for some reason was trying to show that she could sing Winehouse's rehab song. Yeah, we know you can sing it. What are you trying to prove? So people have forgotten that you did it two years ago, but you shouldn't try to show that other betch up by dressing like a Nasty found in the East End back in the day.

Bleach Weekly - Episode 121.

This week - The Crazy New Art.

**Thanks to Gen for some of the pictures!!!**

What was up with that art? It's fantastic but scary; Those droplets of blood, the crazy angles (pointed out by Beetchie), the darkness and the new art direction with the slow mo. and the new sad song...just when you thought this show couldn't get better, it slaps you silly for thinking such nonsense (the same kind of silly Grimmjow Jaggerjack laid down on Ichigo).

The darkness, shadowy greatness:





Shiny new head - ahaha, look at that sheen (sschwing!):



I'm loving the constant shots of black, white and grey. Those flashbacks and heavy moments are so well done but they really need to stop showing my boy getting his ass handed to him and I really need to stop posting it:



Crazy angles...Grimmjow's jaggerjaw is all sorts of messed up! It moves when he laughs. Awesome but I still hate his ass:





The other 'new' thing we need to discuss is Tousen. He's my most hated character and I was hoping that he'd at least get a cool make-over when he went to Hueco Mundo but of course not. That ass looks even worse now! And no offense but now he looks like Geordi LaForge! Stupid visor...

Saturday, April 14, 2007

So far, The Nominees for Ass of the Year include ...

So Don Imus got the ax from CBS because he jokingly called the Rutgers female basketball team some "Nappy-Headed Hos". Way to go Stupid. Now, I am not saying that that was a smart thing to say, because it wasn't, but people have been saying all sorts of shit lately and Don Imus is the only ass who has had serious life-changing repercussions fall on him.

Let us compare the most recent shit talk.

A few months ago Isaiah Washington refered to his co-star T.R. Knight as a "Faggot". Hmmm... Isaiah apologized, made a big show of going to some sort of rehab, donated some money, is pretending that he is not a hateful ass but is still earning himself and that network mucho dinero because last time I checked Grey's anatomy was still in business with all of its cast intact. I guess it is okay to call someone a really awful derogatory name once it is not done in a jocular fashion because then THAT would be serious.

Now, let me rant about the other issues that the Imus incident has raised.

Firstly, Don Imus is now a major news headliner when he should just have been allowed to fade into obscurity as he was doing since noone really cared or knew about his foolish self before this.
Secondly, here are Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson riding in on their Black Horses to highlight their moral outrage on behalf of all Black people, especially their Black sisters. PLEASE, give me a freakin' break. First off, stop carrying on as if you speak for the Black community and secondly, stop trying to carry off all this moral bullshit when You, Jesse Jackson, Reverend, have all these illegitimate children out there and You, Al Sharpton, Reverend? or just likes to sound like one?, should talk more about your affinity for WHITE Prostitutes. Media Asses or Media Hos?
Thirdly, I really love how Jesse Jackson totally avoided the question posed by Meredith Viera about his reference to NYC as "HYMIETOWN". Oh no, not racist at all when you consider it was only Jews he was talking about in a serious derogatory manner.

Epiphany time. I guess it really is not a big deal when one speaks nastily about Homosexuals and Jews. After all, who cares about them?

Gosh, I am an angry Chinky Ho. But only I, and people of my racial descent can use that slur. Noone else.

I have to go to bed.

- H1

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

The Idiots Who Turned Down a Gig @ Wembley Stadium

Dominic Howard and Matthew Bellamy of the band Muse are fans of Klaxons, according to an interview in the NME, and have been to a number of their gigs. They also recently asked Jamie of Klaxons if they would support them for their two Wembley stadium concerts to which he reportedly replied "nah, we don't support anyone" (as reported by the band on a recent Drowned In Sound podcast). The band, who afterwards expressed regret stating alcohol to be a factor in their refusal of the support slot, have since been re-approached and confirmed that they in fact do wish to play with Muse.

Matthew Bellamy has re-opened his offer to Klaxons to support them at the upcoming Wembley gig, when he became aware of the confusion he told NME: "Is that what they've said? Well OK, if they're still up for it, we'll bring them on!" [4] They have still not been confirmed as one of the three bands to support them on both dates.
- source, wikipedia on the Klaxons.

I found this article to be hilarious. Now I'm obsessed with listening to these guys. It kind of scares me that they're often classified as "nu rave" because I'm not sure we should be ravin' anymore but I'll bring them on too! I need to sort them out myself...

Currently listening to: "Naive" by The Kooks.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Wayne Palmer Pulled a Jack Bauer

I'm so running out of titles.

The S6 HC of 24 continues

10 PM to 11 PM:

I'm liking Horlicks this week. He's being a bad ass but even he is Jack Bauer's bitch.

I think it's wrong that Jack Bauer just dismissed the Horlicks just so HE could have fun with the interrogation. I thought they were going to stop that bullsheet!

The ghetto thuggie bounce/walk that the WP did after he almost keeled over was good stuff. It explains a lot. I now understand the origin of the 'walk'. Yeah, MC. I am wrong.

This really is a rip-off of Season 2 or whatever season it was they used the terrorists' children in a plot to make terrorists talk. Seriously, as if these terrorists care if their children get killed.

Jack Bauer tried to sire people again. Awesome.

And look, the Chinese are back. Now the season will get good but we feel awfully betrayed. Why would they have this bullshit filler story about some kind of season 2 plot bombs only to take us back to the Chinese, which as far as we can tell, is a story that had nothing to do with the first 16 episodes?!

The Bauer-ism for tonight:

"When Jack Bauer tells the president he owes him, you best believe he owes him!" - H1

Has anyone else realised that Jack Bauer has turned into a slave mass'r? He not only owned 1 black president, he owned 2!!! Proving once again that Fox is racist. Don't believe us? Think about Curtis, as well (not a president but black).

Jack Bauer sighting: 6 scenes. Okay, and this is why this episode is actually decent because there's lots of JB.

The "Damn It" Count: 1 scene. Ahahaha, that was hilarious. Jack under a garbage truck, holding on for dear life.

Head Count: 6 faked deaths! Ooo, well played especially that bit when Jack got up from the ground like a Lost Boy, but Fayed's too smart for you Betches. 9 deaths.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Apparently I've Been a Lover for a Long Time...

...a lover of Conspiracy Theorists (yeah, even before Matt)!

It may have started with the X-Files and my obsession with Sculder and Mully.

OR!

was it the Dales...? Hmmmm.



Saturday, April 07, 2007

SAF, we're not bringing "the shit" back.

L

Here's my L





Holding everything with disdain.



Smiling! Awwwww... ::sniff::



And eating. Constantly eating candy... my L =(



::waaauuuggghhhhh::

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Okay

Keith Richards: 'I Snorted My Father'

LONDON (AP) -- Keith Richards has acknowledged consuming a raft of illegal substances in his time, but this may top them all. In comments published Tuesday, the 63-year-old Rolling Stones guitarist said he had snorted his father's ashes mixed with cocaine.

"The strangest thing I've tried to snort? My father. I snorted my father," Richards was quoted as saying by British music magazine NME.

"He was cremated and I couldn't resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn't have cared," he said. "... It went down pretty well, and I'm still alive."

Richards' father, Bert, died in 2002, at 84.

Richards, one of rock's legendary wild men, told the magazine that his survival was the result of luck, and advised young musicians against trying to emulate him.

"I did it because that was the way I did it. Now people think it's a way of life," he was quoted as saying.

"I've no pretensions about immortality," he added. "I'm the same as everyone ... just kind of lucky.

"I was No. 1 on the `who's likely to die' list for 10 years. I mean, I was really disappointed when I fell off the list," Richards said.


© 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved

If his father didn't mind, then who are we to judge?

Monday, April 02, 2007

This Shit Again!

Yeah, the S6 24 HC Continues. For another week. Maybe this week will be better.

9 PM to 10 PM:

Milo and Horlicks are having a fight with that Ovaltine stuck in the middle. I don't know why I said that either but it's probably 'cause I'm really bored right now.

Ok, Horlicks is trying to find 'answers' of the greater kind. Perhaps he should be an atheist and be done because he seemed to have gone through all the major religions. Or maybe he should be a Mormon because according to SP (which had a better episode of 24 last week) that is the RIGHT religion.

Mahone's wife is a real bitch! You just can't trust an alien!

SGGDH II is here, the master of the obvious and she's annoying as all hell.

This scene at the water front looks awfully familiar. It looks like that time Jack shot and killed the Russian John Voight. But don't be fooled people! It IS the same place! All they did was stuck a ferris wheel in the background to make it seem 'new'.

Head Count: 4 + 1 arm. Ah those Russians, they know to ham it up. That was one dramatic death but the best I've seen in a long time. Perhaps it was second after ClAUdia got her ass gunned down.

We're adding a new count this week -

Jack Bauer sighting: 2 scenes.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

THE CHRIS CORNELL CONSPIRACY

A guest blog by Battler with minor edits by Or 2.

In February we learned that Chris Cornell has split with Audioslave "Due to irresolvable personality conflicts as well as musical differences”.

In addition, he said “"It was clear to all of us we needed some time apart, and what that produces is anybody's guess," he said. "In my case, it produced a very prolific writing period, and getting back into writing songs on my own, liking what that means — which is sort of a freedom and time to just experiment with music to a degree I kind of like more — and making records that have everything I like about music in them. Audioslave was a very fresh collaboration because it was very much like a young band, where you all write together in a room. But my experience, in terms of songwriting and record-creating, is not like a 19-year-old guy in a rock band. For me to be satisfied, I think I need to be able to be on my own, in the long run."

As with all bullshit statements, we need to examine and read between the lines.

Chris, for all intents and purposes, needed to see other people.

That conversation probably went down like this, "The sex was good but not enough to keep him around. Its not you guys, its me! I hope we can be friends. And oh, by the way: I am a musical icon, and you fuckers are just not mature enough for me. The music was aiight but not something I’d put on my ipod. Which, like Prince, only includes my music. I like ‘em young and you girls were just getting too old for my taste. Peace, Sukkas."

Let's come correct for a moment and examine the possible reasons for the “irresolvable personality conflicts as well as musical differences”:


HIS LAST SOLO ATTEMPT WAS IN 1999; HE NEEDED AUDIOSLAVE FOR VISIBILITY.

Audioslave was just a jump off. Actually, it was Rick Rubin’s fault; after Rage broke up (for the same reasons, ironically) the boys wanted to record and Rubin practually begged Chris to jump on board.

Why?

Because everything Chris does IS Soundgarden, and that is what the fans want. Not more C, but more Soundgarden. Search the archives of Rolling Stone or Billboard; all fans are hoping for is a reunion tour.

Plus, (and let's veer off for a bit to address that crazy GDDH) Rubin is a money slut.

This was the age of Super groups (Velvet Revolver, Queens of the Stoneage) and what he was hoping for was another Temple of The Dog. But alas, Vedder was too busy getting Neil Young ass. And Chris, doing nothing more than writing songs for Casino Royale (in which he said, “I am the right man for the job”) Bug, Great Expectations (among others) saw this as his chance to remind people that he is “all there is.”

HE NEEDED TIME TO WORK ON HIS TAN.





Last I checked, he lives in Paris. Where there is no sun. But he always has a tan.



In Soundgarden, he was pale. Hmm.

HE WAS JUST TOO PRETTY.

Sure, everyone remembers how he did almost every show and video for SG topless. And all the girls in highschool went OOOOOh. Like Sanjaya he needs his own alternative universe where the he can be admired for his hair again.

HIS NAME IS CHRIS CORNELL.

Every Chris I have known was a self absorbed, narciistic “talentented” some what good looking shallow diva. His last name is associated with an Ivy league school, which is also full of self absorbed, narcistic talented people. Which follows he would break up two bands. Logical Hochie, correct me on this tautology.

AND THE REAL REASON: HE WANTED MORE MONEY.

From page six of the Post, the authority on dirt:

February 23, 2007 -- CHRIS Cornell quit his band, Audioslave, forever last week because of "irresolvable personality conflicts," but sources say it was about the money. "Chris was unhappy with the financial arrangement within the group - he wrote all the music, yet the other three bandmates took an equal share in the multimillion-dollar publishing rights," a Cornell friend said. Meanwhile, Cornel's wife, Vicky, has surprised him with a $3 million retreat at the ultra-exclusive Fairmont Tamarack Resort in Idaho, which is owned by Andre Agassi and Stefanie Graf. The 5,000-square-foot ski lodge has five bedrooms, mountain views, floor-to-ceiling windows, outdoor Jacuzzi, and a state-of-the-art music room.

From Stereogum,

Think he was being greedy? Or should the principal songwriter always take a bigger cut? Coldplay splits it four ways, if that means anything to you. We've heard Radiohead splits their money evenly as well, although some say Thom gets "a little more, nothing major." In the case of Audioslave, Chris wanted a larger share of the royalties, the band wanted an equal share; guess that qualifies as "irresolvable personality conflicts." Although the band probably should have paid us for suffering through the self-affirming tripe of "Be Yourself."

According to Chris :"Musicians aren't the kind of people who concentrate or worry about what the other guy thinks." Touche, Francophile.

Finally:
http://www.velvetrope.com/ubbthreads/showflat.php?Cat=0&Number=929996&an=0&page=0

Just my two cents.

Another Reason Why Disney's Evil

For some reason, the Disney Channels keep trying to push Gingers. There are Gingers in many of their programs. They even let this stupid little asshole kid named Daniel Cook get his own mini show where he goes around trying to 'learn' things from people but really he just terrorizes them.

That's right. I'm not above calling children assholes when they deserve to be called a such.

Currently watching: Charlie and Lola, a show that has no Gingers and that is why it's awesome.
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