Sunday, August 26, 2007

Christmas List 2007

It's the end of August and you'd think that I'd already have had my Christmas shopping done, right?

Har Har.

So this year I've slacked some but I did start my list today.

It's looking kind of sad this year since I don't know what to get you people. Suggestions are welcome but not necessarily accepted.

Don't forget, request something ridiculous and feel the wrath of me come December.

Also, can you believe in making my list I forgot to put X on there?

Guess it must mean she gets nothing from me this year.


  1. Dear Santa Beetchie.

    The presento-pyo's I would like this year are as follows.

    a) Lily Allen sans bow and erratic alcoholic behavior, but with wet t-shirt on my doorstep

    b) If you can't get past that whole "visa revoked" thing, Shakira, Jennifer Beals or Brangelina would also be suitable substitutes

    c) An iphone, unlocked, because it would just be that much cooler

    d) A german shepard puppy, male with buff coloring. European breeding lines only.

    e) Inoue removed from the lexicon of Bleach characters, forever.

    f) Trappist Westvleteren 12 beer, as difficult to acquire as it is to pronounce. Damn those craft belgium monks.

    h)Or failing all of that a "Beer and Titties" t-shirt from seeew-gay.

    You get working on that list okay? Thanks!

    Ungrateful and unrepentant,


  2. Don't matter to me. No one's getting presents from me this year anyway due to these damned overpriced nuptials.

  3. X, I don't know why I have to suffer because of your wedding.

    In fact, I refuse to suffer any longer.

    The money I would have spent on you and your wedding, I will now spend on a PS3.

    As far as I'm concerned, that would love me more.


  4. Dear Ungrateful and Unrepentant Beetchie,

    I'm working on your bullshart of a list. So far I think I can swing the t-shirt.

    But I have a good few months to sort this out, so no fears. I will get things done.


  5. Dear Santa Beetchie,

    I realized that I forgot the most important presento-pyo to put on the list, so I will amend that error now.

    i) A sugah-daddy for you so that I may live the good life. (Sometimes you gotta give a little to get a little)

    Oh and I agree a PS3 would love you (and me) more and not upset the balance of your bank account and home-body'ery with sadistic "overpriced nuptial" trips to the Caribbean.

    Still rather ungrateful and happily unrepentant,


  6. You bitches are all getting lumps of coal and if you are not careful they might magically become lumps of shit if this shart does not end soon.

    - Gnomey Gnome for H1


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