Monday, June 07, 2010

Gear Up

After over a one year hiatus, the Oxtails are coming to you LIVE at some point in 2010.

After in-band dissent and controversy swirling around members, with added inspiration from idol band Spinal Tap and the affinity to being unable to hold a drummer, the Oxtails are re-grouping with its two stable members.

Life has somewhat changed for The Oxtails.

The Guitarist G, has become immersed in Veterinarian School and is currently learning how to induce anesthesia.  Surely her skills and acquired knowledge from Vet. School will be of use when other band members of The Oxtails become ill.
Certainly we can put her to use when Oxymorons faint on cue.

Surely her skills from her large, farm animals class will pay off...right?

Lead Singer Zarnyx/Sariel (which one is it?!) was still having an identity crisis but it was ultimately decided (at least today...who knows what tomorrow will bring?) that Zarnyx will step in to take over full vocal duties.

New Management? Hardly, as H1 is still at the helm - barking orders, ensuring frugal spending and kicking ass.

The Drummer: still wanted.  No set drummer has been enlisted since the scandal involving a drunken X, lack of band practice and now...a baby on the way?!?!?!

The Bassist: In an attempt to find his blackness and false truths (everyone but the bassist remembers his true calling), MC has gone off to spin tunes and has chosen a new solo career path as a DJ.
He assures us his skills will be returned to the Oxtails at some point to make the band even edgier.  We have yet to hear that he even got a turntable much less some beats.  We are not holding our breath.

And as if we needed to add more trouble to the mix...

For this new line-up, we are currently holding auditions for a keyboardist.

Bughie J. may have the most recent experience with a keyboard but if all else fails i.e. if Bughie J. cannot be our ivory wiz due to sickness from daily bug inhalation on his nightly jogs, H1 may have to step in as both Manager and Keyboardist citing 2 years of classical training in the piano.

"'Do-re-mi' and 'Chopsticks' nevah sounded so gooood", is what the world will be chanting.

Stay Tuned...


  1. I have had enough of this slandering of my good name. Even the blog has had "anuft." My boozing and skipping band practice had nothing to do with my getting knocked up...well maybe boozing did have a part to play, but I DO know who da baby daddy is. So there. ANUFT (w.v.)!!

  2. Really? I think Bloggie Boo had 'anuft' of your lies.

  3. "Lysta" (Listen, in Word Verification Bloggie Boo speak):

    It is becoming apparent that with your constant harrassment of your former-band members - I may have to have a discussion with H1 to hire a bouncer. I should hold interviews for that post as well.

    Frass?'d let any floozy in to see us.

    I'll hold an emergency meeting with H1.

  4. Keep her boozing tail out before we end up on some crappy VH1 behind the music special. And blogigie confirms "derroti".

    As for me, my return is imminent. The DJ gig did not work out so well for me in my new surroundings

  5. Um, so you say MC. Sure, blame it on your surroundings! But yes...I kinda understand. I do. I really do.

    G. is talking about "might have to be Chinesey and jump from guitar to keyboard". What?

    Then she tells me she won't do harmonies because she wasn't going to be "pulling any Matt Bellamy shit". Such disrespect!


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...