New Year's Eve with The Cheat, Diderick and Gnome

Goodness.

This year, the Cheat did not drink as much as he usually does. There was no mixing of pills and vodka but Diderick the Christmas Goose Lout was also in the fray.



There was a fight.



They downed the entire bottle of alcohol and for reasons unknown, they did a Caribbean theme this year.

They even brought a couple of rasta yardies and filled them up with alcohol.





::shudder::

Perhaps the most shocking display of all shocking New Year's Eve events of all the years, is that Gnome was present.

Gnome's underaged.



I am mortified and ashamed by The Cheat's behaviour.

Luckily, Gnome thought it all a game and didn't drink any.

Decemberween Eve with The Cheat, Diderick and Gnomey-Gnome

This Decemberween Eve, The Cheat had some new friends to celebrate with. I am uncertain how that worked out for me considering they all chipped in and got me a gift. I was expecting three but it's The Cheat, so he'll find a way to keep all the money to himself as per usual.

This was Gnome's first Decemberween. He was chittering excitedly all day from an undisclosed Hide & Seek location:



Come 10.21 PM, the critters gathered 'round on the swivel chair for the gift exchange.

Gnome, with grin from ear to ear, inspected his present:



And was pleasantly surprised to find that a new friend awaited him on the inside!



Diderick and I had a discussion earlier this month about his lack of present. I assured him, his hooliganry-related present was out there in this world, waiting for me to take it by force.

That has seemed to satisfy his Decemberween needs.

A winner was me with The Cheat's pyo this year as well:



Yes, he is a huge fan.

H1 seemed happy with it too, now that I think about it...

Finally, I opened my present. It is apparent The Cheat likes to be a lifesaver on this holiday. Last year there were TSCs and this year:



Diderick chose the flavour. I am told he is a connoisseur of Gorgonzola.

Now The Cheat prepares for New Year's Day but this year I think the Christmas Goose will show him a thing or two about drinks and getting well sloshed.

Here's hoping for no fights on the 1st.

"Doodle, Doodle"

It's been near six days since Gnome has returned to Castle in the Fog after his excursion to some sort of School Beyond Red Carpet Turf.

Gnome never rests.

Gnomey-mobile has been busily puttering along over Flat Hillians, near Smudgey Lake and back and forth between Castle in the Fog and Gnome Cottage - The weather has been unseasonably warm for this time of year, so Gnome Cottage remains open.

He heard something last week while enjoying a slice of his favourite Fall pie, which of course is Pumpkin and Some Kind of Apple.

With colour pencils in hand and chittering with excitement, he gets to work on a blank piece of paper he found lying near his Junior Accounting Calculator.



"All creatures deserve greetings of this kind", thinks Gnome happily, "even if they send me fleeing...quivering under a bush."

He is particulary fond of his "Y"'s and his "O"'s, as he draws busily away, grinning from ear to ear.

The Fall Life of Gnome

Aside from his part time job as junior accountant at Castle in the Fog, apart from his daily drive through Gnome Country and despite his full time work of hiding under bushes from the sight of the giant known as Boobey-Head, Gnome also attends school.

At least, this is what he is doing this Fall of 2007.

"And why not?" thinks he, as he stands waiting patiently for the bus outside his day apartment.



The little shiny yellow school bus arrives (it isn't very timely, this bus - in fact, it is so untimely that it arrives at 5.11 PM on a Saturday, at the end of September), all packed with children.



It appears that Gnome is attending Human School!

They're very small for human children but that is an observation held only by the narrator of this story and should not be focused on by you readers.

Gnome hops on the bus, his stripey hat too tall to get through the door without being flattened down some, and takes his seat on the right.



It is here he chitters (Gnomes chitter and do not chatter, in the event anyone was wondering) with the children. We are not sure if they understand him nor are we certain he understands them but Gnome is very clever, so we can assume that he does.

It matters not what the conversation is about, or whether the children understand their foreign exchange student (they all call him "FES"), who appeared one day coming out of the bush near Smudgey Mirror Lake; what matters is that Gnome is off to adventure, to some school beyond Red Carpet Turf, through the mossy green, on the bumpy road in the little shiny yellow school bus, all the while grinning from ear to ear.

Narrator's Update: Gnome has not yet returned from his Fall School Adventure. I was unaware that this was an all Season Event or at least, this is the conclusion I've come to. But all is not not well, for Gnome has sent me a post card. It seems as though he has been playing lots of H&S, a game of which he is Champeen.



It amazes me that he has managed to take this picture of himself but he is clever, so I question nothing.

Or perhaps this is some sort of class at Some School beyond Red Carpet Turf?

I cannot wait for Gnome to return, so he that he may chitter all about it.

Currently listening to: "Woods of Mystery" by Koji Kondo, "Crabby Beach" by Soichi Terada, and "The Wagon on the Way to the Stripey Tent" by Arctic Monkeys

The Hat The Cat Attacked

For those not in the know, Gnome Friend loves Hide and Seek. In fact, he is Champeen of the sport! Why, even this past Saturday a game was in the works. Lots of people were over at Castle in the Fog for an outdoorsy event in the Sun that occasionally peeks through the clouds in the Summer, so Gnome took the opportunity to play. Whether or not the guests knew they were playing is not the point here but being hidden for hours with no one finding him, only solidified that Gnome is the best when it comes to H&S.

Today, he played again.

But discovered that hiding behind beasties is a great idea at first…



Until said Beasties spot you.



And become interested in your striped blue hat.





The game of H&S is not without risks but allows for a very interesting game of Cat and Gnome.



Of which Gnome is also Champeen despite what it may look like to the untrained eye.

He enjoys a challenge, all the while grinning from ear to ear.

Goo'day.

A Day In the Life of Gnome

After a day's work of driving from his day apartment near Flat Hillians, over Bridgey Bridge, through the forest of some-kind-of-an-apple trees (which incidentally has only two trees, forming an archway of sorts), and on the edge of Smudgy Mirror Lake, Gnome reaches his Castle in the Fog.

There, his work is not finished.

Indeed, avoiding the Giant known as "Boobey-Head" (or so Gnome gathered one day after hearing a thunderous echo bellow above his head and hidden ears under his pointed striped blue hat call to the mythical creature, forcing Gnome to dart under the Clothey Bush in the Garden near his summer home, Gnome-Cottage) was not the only task Gnome would undertake that day.

At Castle in the Fog, he finds himself drafted into doing tedious calculations.



"Grin from ear to ear!", says Gnome.

This is Gnome's life motto, regardless of the situation and a good motto it is, he thinks.

However, all work and no play for Gnome will not do.

Listening to music through oversized headphones and doing a bit of a jig (stiff jig as it may seem to the untrained eye) is a grand way to spend the evening:



Alas, it is 10.10 PM, also known as "The Gnomey Hour", and it is time for our friend to rest.

It's been a long, hard day.



Tossing and turning is a must before shut eye,



but comfy pillows cradle Gnome off into the Land of the Zzzs, where dreams of Boobey-Heads, calculators, Mirror Lake and Flat Hillians lie waiting....oddly enough on what looks like carpet.

Goo'day.



Currently listening to: "Direction" by Interpol