The H1 Or 2

Went to sea,
In a beautiful, not pea green boat
They took some US and a whole lot of nothing else
wrapped up in a 60 pound note

They flew away for .5 and 4 days
To the land where the samaan grows

And there in the wood,
They became piggy-wigs where they stood
And ate every bullshart they could find off the damned island of Trinidad

Starting with Thursday's dinner

Mario's Pizza, which turned out to be a disappointment. The crust recipe has gone horribly wrong and the copious amounts of meatage have been cut back:



At least the pepper sauce remains phenomenal



In addition to pizza, elevensies pmsies came around for Round 2 and a belly full of KFC zingers were had. Sadly, there are no pictures of that to share.

Friday dawned, with a trip to the market in search of doubles but none were to be found (the early bird gets the worm and apparently the doubles).



The only way to cure a lack of doubles, is to nap away the depression, so napped we did and awoke to hear an MC - the sound of which made us go back to nap for another half an hour.

The nap failed to cure us of said MC but the watered down green sands he brought (no fault of his) helped us forget our woes some



but as you can see, we needed spees and a pastelle to recover as well.





Nothing can be right with the world, until Aunty P.'s chocolate cake is made and devoured first at 8 PM and then again at 2 AM on

Saturday morning

where our previous misfortune was rectified with a bag of the good stuff not attained on Friday



With limited time and not even half of the edible things on the island in Or 2's stomach, a trip to Maracas was in order for bake and shark.



OMG. GOO'D TIMES! Gaze upon the beauty of one of the greatest things on earth. And people wonder why I love me a shark. Tch. What's to question, people?

Also, what's not to love about a chow, shrimp wontons and Trinidadian KFC?







Sunday came after waking every hour to find out if TD5 had made it home safely, and brought the best damned breakfast one could have.



Or 2 hearts her some blood pudding, Kerrygold butter, hops, pawpaws, portugal and Scrambled Eggs.

An X & M Wedding Later (no pictures taken of the food - that'd just be kind of rude. Pictures of boobs can be taken but food, no), Monday arrived and the last day for eating had come with it.

::sniff::

Ramsaram's Peanut Punch,



beef pies,



cream soda of the good solo variety,



milk pennacools,



cheese, chicken and tuna puffs,



and of course, the favourite coloured popcorn were all had,



but was not met without some passing judgment upon thee.

More eats followed that night but no pictures are present for proof.
Rest assured it involved curried chicken, fried okra, melongene choka, tomato choka and roti.

The festivities only ended today even after being in NY for officially a week now. Why? Because like every good Trinidadian, we were made to bring food back with us by the peeps and thank goodness.

Duck, roti, curried mango, fudge, non-eaten zoomers (curse you, Frass! J/K), and pelau made from freshly shelled pigeon peas (thanks Uncle P.!) were all consumed within the last week.

Thank you to TD5, Pandy, Chrissy Lee and Aunty P. for putting up with my demands and pain in the asshattery and for acquiring most things of my list.

It is greatly appreciated and another list will be forthcoming.

Har Har.

Love you all and miss you terribly,

H1 and Or 2.

Part II of the Trinidad Adventures will be posted soon enough. Excuse the craziness of this one. I'm practically asleep on myself hya.

Memorable Memories & Quotes of the Trip:

The good times, the laughs and antics were plentiful and I cannot possibly remember it all to lay in print and that's what pictures are for but a few notes -

"What the eff! Stop putting shit on our bodies David Blaine!"

Or 2: I was judged for getting coloured popcorn!! Isn't that wrong?!
Georg: I'm kind of judging you myself right now.
Dar: One day, people in this world will not be judged by the colour of their popcorn.

Currently listening to: "Viva Rock" by Orange Range

Edit: A list of things eaten but not photographed/pictured are as follows - curried chicken, bussupshot, fried okra, bake and New Zealand cheddar.

Doin' Stuff

Doin' the sort of stuff that I like to call "dirty work" ie the things I've put off for months but rather enjoy doing regardless.

This is it - I'm officially out of blank discs and can no longer back up any material. This is a reminder to H1 that discs are needed and badly.

As I do stuff, let me write out my random playlist because I'm clearly not doing enough as is. I would like to point out that this is what I get for sleeping all day and now am too awake to do nothing else but stuff. In turn, this is what you get. Curse you, Trinis!

Currently listening to:

"Blackout!" - The Cloud Room
"Challenge" - Nobuo Uematsu, from the FFX Sdtk
"Shame on You" - Hot Hot Heat
"A Million Ways" - OK Go
"Losing My Religion" - R.E.M.
"Microphone Fiend" - Rage Against The Machine
"K.K. Sound Check" - Kenta Nagata, Toru Minegishi, Shinobu Tanaka from the Animal Crossing Sdtk
"Ittsuu no Shoutaijou" - Saitou Tsuneyoshi, from the xxxHolic: Manatsu no Yoru no Yume Sdtk
"Graaf, Emperor of Darkness" - Yasunori Mitsuda
"Want It All Back" - Yoko Kanno & The Seatbelts, from the Cowboy Bebop Sdtk
"Hero Summon is a Success!" - Tsuyoshi Sekito, from the Brave Fencer Musashiden Sdtk
"Ninja Hideout" - Koji Hayama, from the Ape Escape 2 Sdtk
"Way Home" - Michiru Oshima, from the Fullmetal Alchemist Sdtk
"Meatplow" - Stone Temple Pilots
"Fancy" - Yeah Yeah Yeahs
"Squares" - The Beta Band, from the Six Feet Under Sdtk
"Coming Undone" - Korn
"Hobo's Theme" - Kevin Manthei, from the Invader Zim Sdtk
"Dry Your Eyes" - The Streets
"Shockwave" - Black Tide
"Who's Theme" - Tsutchie featuring Minmi, from the Samurai Champloo Sdtk
"Your Blue Room" - Passengers
"Breath Me" - Sia, from the Six Feet Under Sdtk
"The Beauty of Gray" - Live
"The Fallen" - Franz Ferdinand
"Just" - Radiohead
"Meet Catch & Trail Again" - Koji Kondo, from the Mask of Majora Sdtk
"Too Much Brandy" - The Streets
"Sending a Dream into the Universe" - Nobuo Uematsu, from the Final Fantasy VII Sdtk
"Nagare, Kuukyo, This Word" - Uverworld, from the Death Note The Movie Sdtk
"Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want" - Muse
"I Bet That You Look Good on the Dancefloor" - Arctic Monkeys
"Mars: The Bringer of War" - Gustav Holst
"Joke" - Mindless Self Indulgence
"Gloves" - The Horrors
"Dancing Calbrena" - Nobuo Uematsu, from the Final Fantasy IV Sdtk
"Discovery (unused track)" - Mitsuhiko, from the Legend of Zelda: The Minish CapSdtk (argh! now i'm going have this 3 second noise on my recently played that'll take me months to clear!)
"Musica Mundana" - Yoko Shimomura, from the Parasite Eve Sdtk (this is the stuff of nightmares, jeebus)
"Vegetable" - Radiohead (really old Radiohead, often painful listening)
"Astro Boy" - Blonde Redhead (that was my first time listening to them and it was well awful)

That's that. That last song broke my computer headphones, the delta ones aren't fitting my ears and my good ones are so good, they're picking up a whole bunch of static from my not so good working condition of my speaker, and thus the playlist ends, as does my work for tonight. No music, no working. Aren't you people fortunate?
Me? Not so much! I'm ending the night on a lowlamp!

Obsessions For The Weeks: 11/12 - 01/01

There have been many since but I've been slackin' with these updates. Meh, anyway:



Super Mario Galaxy!



Have a Goomba, Beetchie. Don't worry, it'll get spun on its head then kicked. Heh heh heh heh.

Star Shiny Fun



And Rock Band



The Oxtails now have 20,000 fans and that's without a lead singer.

Lies! GD Lieeeeesss!!!

For me, anyway... I am my most hated character in Love Hina:



But once again, H1 is just who she's supposed to be:



Bo ha ha ha ha ha ha. Oops, wrong series.

Just As We Always Knew

"The Heroine of the movie, who is the first African American Disney Princess, caused some controversy when she was given the perceived stereotypically lower-class black name "Maddy" and was made a chambermaid , an occupation some felt not in keeping with the image of a Disney Princess (despite the household drudgery that earlier princesses Cinderella and Snow White had to perform). These character choices were interpreted by some as racist, and Disney acted swiftly in response."

Source: www.wikipedia.org

She ain't no damned princess of frogs or anything for that matter!!!!

Beetchie's Survival Guide To Grenada

In a day or two, Beetchie will begin a new chapter in her life which we lay claim to the publishing rights in the future.

The Island of Grenada may not be prepared for her but hopefully through this guide, Beetchie will be prepared for Island Livin'.

Things To Avoid:

1. West Indians - but seeing as how you've already ignored that rule, avoid MC's The Spices.

2. Them damned Folklore Creepies such as: Anancy. Anancy's a spider, so if you don't like those sort of things (which you don't), avoid it.

La Diablesse - wikipedia has called this a "well-dressed woman", really is just a damned female vampire who needs to get an updated sense of fashion for 2008. So, if you don't like females that suck on your neck (which you do), then avoid them as well.

Ligaroo - wikipedia has cited this as a werewolf. In Trinidad, we call them "Lagahoo". If there's one thing we've noted, it's that Grenadians cannot spell but that is no reason to avoid them. In any event, if you don't like puppies of the wolf variety (which you may or may not), then avoid them.

3. H1 says: Oildown - I'm not sure this is the National dish of the Island, they might claim it but it might be Trinidadian. They can have it as far as we're concerned.
Or 2 says H1 is crazy.

Thing To Do If Above Scenarios Cannot Be Avoided:

1. Always walk around with a cutlass (a West Indian machete). That pretty much takes care of most of the above if confronted by any of the situations previously listed.

A breakdown for you: La Diablesse always wears a long dress. If you cannot avert your eyes, then wait until she lifts up the dress to reveal a hoof. We know you're going to vet school but no, it's not a condition you need to diagnosis and treat accordingly. The only thing you should be doing, is taking your cutlass and chopping away.

The Ligaroo, as said before, is a werewolf. I guess arm yourself with treats and you'll be alright. We have not tested this ourselves, so I guess if it doesn't work out, we'll read about you in their newspapers. Do they even have newspapers?

Edit: Frass did some googlin' and discovered that they are also called "loogaroos" and that you should "look out for loogaroos skin hidden in bushes in bottles". He didn't say what you do after that but one would assume burn them to smithereenies. But you know what happens when one assumes. That's right, it makes an ass out of you and me and possibly more so you, when some Loogaroos get pissed off and come after you.

Your advice from Frass is one that is based on Trinidadian folklore. He can't quite remember which of the creatures you're supposed to do these things for but you have to throw rice in front of your house to repel something. And for another, if you're coming into your house after midnight, you're supposed to walk into your doorway backwards. I think it's called, "watching your back". Being that he can't remember which these are for and if Grenada even has these "things", then once again, one word: cutlass.

Things To Bring or Buy:

1. Bug Spray. If you can't travel with that sort of stuff, then go forth and purchase some "Det".
Det to de flies, det to de roaches, det to de mosquito (x3), Det kill dem Deeeaaaaaaddddd!!! - we're not sure if singing the jingle will work but it certainly is entertaining. If they don't have "det" then you screwed. Ahaha, kidding. But you know, get whatever.

2. Oh, and a little thing called a "cockset" you should also buy. It's a coil that when lit, burns all the way 'round during the night (you light it in the evening for when the nasties come buzzing around) and the smoke wards off those mosquitoes. However, being that you tried to burn down Or 2's apartment that one time in college, maaaayybe you should just stick to your bug spray. Chances are they don't even sell that anymore in Trinidad or anywhere else, it's so damned dangerous.

3. Frass says to get a "Vape Mat". It's an electric device that has a sweet smelling mat in it that can be changed daily. If it's anything like our Electric Mosquito killer at home, then the mosquitoes get attracted to the blue glowing light and get fried in there, then stick on to the mat. I'm not sure if it's same thing but one thing is clear, please don't throw raves by the blue light and end up like a mosquito.

4. Carry a flashlight.
A point which Frass disagrees on. He says to take a candle because we've forgotten that batteries are expensive.

While on the Island, Don't Forget To

1. Knock out your shoes in the event a scorpion or other creepie crawlies have gotten in.

2. Not make friends with multi-legged creatures.

3. Stay away from coconut trees. Even though they are tempting, they harbour scorpions. Just leave well enough alone. Also, don't try to climb those either. Leave it to the professionals! That's right, the beach peeps with no shirts and no cares in the world.

4. Not nap under a coconut tree for fear of falling coconuts.

5. Not nap under an almond tree for fear of falling coral snakes.

There's not much more we can add to this guide. You'll be attending a good and newly built school catered mostly to American and other foreign students, so we think you'll be fine for the most part.

Congratulations and we will miss you but we've skype, the phone, and the Internet for communication!

Don't forget that the months will go by quickly and we'll be "Rock Band" -ing and doing all manners of craziness very soon together.

No worries, you'll be fine!!!

P.S. Don't search Wikipedia on Grenada. They don't seem very reliable a source for information on this particular topic.

The Original Beetchie

Only the good die young.

Our Beetchie Gourami has kicked the bucket today.

Let us have a moment of silence for the same asshole who killed countless fish, including some orange clouds, some guppies and cannabilized on his own kind like nobody's buisness.

His evilness continued well into his 8th year with The HOchieS because who could hate a fish that survived a bout of solitary confinement? Certainly not us.

Here's to you, BG.

Spring 2000 (who knows how long he was alive before then?) - 1/12/2008.

All the while we thought it was "garami" but his death has led us to discover that it's actually "gourami". No wonder he never responded to us and was so beetchie all the damned time.

Huh.

Just Because

Currently: remembering the good times with Flight of the Conchords.

Observations This Week and Way Back When

When it comes to ginger ale, there are three major brands that I've categorized accordingly - the best is Canada Dry. I know, it's Canadian and one would think it'd be the worst but not so, my friends. If there's one thing Canadian's know, they know lots aboot ginger ale.
Next is Schwepps.
The lowest of the low is Seagrams.

Today, I discovered I can apply this to frankfurters as well.

The best is Nathan's, hands down.
Second would be that Hebrew National stuff.
The lowest of the low goes to none other than Ball Park. I remember when Michael Jordan used to endorse them.

Challenge me if you will!

Last week Saturday, H1 and I were on the subway platform awaiting the train when we observed this bit of ghettory:







If you can't quite make it out, it's a roll of toilet paper. Some people bring packets of tissue but I guess you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes.

Today we found this kiosk in the mall and were confused:



Currently listening to: "Miranda That Ghost Just Isn't Holy Anymore: A. Vade Mecum" by The Mars Volta.

You Are NOT the Mama!

Here's hoping C.Brown does not launch any surprises on Beetchie tomorrow at the Maury Povich show.

The Quiz Book, The Beetchie, The Frass and The H1 That Keeps on Giving...

...often true/often sketchy results, often shady yet hilariously funny stories, laughs of the hold your head in shame variety, and glares that can kill a man that only leader of the Gotei 13 can give.

In a "see you in 2-5 months, Beetchie! I bid you goo'day!" goo'day, we went adventuring to a new eatery establishment.

It was new to H1 and Frass, "new" to me as I had had that style of goodness in Kyoto last year and "new" to Beetchie who had been drunk the first time when she was in attendance.

Raw meat, fire, good laughs, not so good drinks and vetsin were plentiful at Yakiniku Juju, a Japanese BBQ grill and shabu shabu restaurant in the East Village.

It was fun times as per usual when we get together and certainly not the last of the fun times with Beetchie.

The fun comes with the conversations obviously and those gd pictures I will have to post and edit with some bao heads but for the record:

2 Scullys, 1/1 Sculder/Mully and 1 Mulder investigated the paranormal and the prospect of what would happen if 1 Tony Soprano, 1/1 Tony Soprano/Melfi, 1/1 Melfie/Paulie Walnuts, and 1 Paulie Walnuts took a hit out on 2 Aquamen, 1 Batman and 1 Robin at dinner today.

Pictures, and those Memorable Quotes and Conversations of the Evening:





H1: oh gyad! What is that?! This isn't pomegranate juice!
Beetchie: Tastes like a peach and a white grape.
Or 2: Peach + White Grape = Pomegranate? Wtf are you talking about!

Frass: I want a fork please.

Beetchie: A crazy Thai girl tried to get with me yesterday. I don't mess around with girls who have boyfriends.
H1: I thought you would welcome turning the straight gay.
Beetchie: There will be no peen on this hallowed ground.

Beetchie: I want to be Scully!
::after quiz results::
H1: Beetchie, you're Mulder. You're Scully's girlfriend.

::during quiz::
H1: If you were a chess piece you would be...?
Beetchie: Knight!
Or 2: Rook!
Frass: Knight!
H1: Knight, what? You'd be the Queen! I am KING.

H1: I could use more meat...
::waiter comes and turns off grill::
H1:...well I guess not.

H1: ...choice d is "sidekick". Or 2 you are a sidekick!
Or 2: Yeah, that's true. But oh man, I'm sealing my fate as Robin!

::check comes and is laid in front of Frass::
Frass: See? Just because I'm a man they gave me the check.
Or 2: Whatever, Wonder Woman, just pay the damned thing.

::after quiz results::
H1: Okay, What?! Beetchie and I are Aquaman. Wtf! Frass is Batman! and Or 2, you're Robin.
Or 2: Damn it!

Or 2: Did you like the (green tea) ice-cream?
Frass: No. It tastes like ashes.

H1: Robin, go get the coats.
Or 2: I don't move until Batman tells me too.

Beetchie: Blah blah blah, don't you be frontin' Robin.
Or 2: What's that? I can't quite understand or hear you. I'm not a fish.
Beetchie: Shut up! (at least that's what I think she said. Har Har)

Currently listening to: "Fire It Up" by Modest Mouse.

The HOchieS Take Another Quiz...

...and it is revealed that H1, as per usual, is one heck of a Biatch. Please note just how high the results are for some of the bitchiest characters. Are we surprised she's Captain Commander?
Stop being surprised, Watanuki.

Also discovered on this day, a bit of surprising news - according to this quiz Or 2 is not the sickly Captain:



but at least one that is well-loved, not that the sickly aren't loved. They need the most love.

Currently listening to: "10 x 10" by Yeah Yeah Yeahs. I may be developing an obsession with a vegan. For shame...

Not For The Faint of Heart

I've a shocking confession to make.

I like popcorn flavoured jelly belly jelly beans.

On another note, this is the year we are all going to perish.

The cold air and horrendous disaster driven weather has stormed its way across the U.S.
California is expected to have some eerie devastating weather anomoly, while Floridian farmers are doing their best to protect their Citrus crops from the freezing temperatures.

This translates into a vicious domino effect cycle leading to my demise.

1. The oranges could die.
2. There'd be no orange juice production.
3. I can't drink orange juice after eating bacon.
4. If I can't drink orange juice to help wash the bacon down, then I can't eat bacon.
5. If I can't eat bacon, then I might as well just lay down and die.

2008 is already turning out to be the lamest year yet.

What next? Mega-Tsunami?
H1, shut your goat assy mouth.

Memorable Conversation of the Evening:

H1: OH NO YOU DON'T. YOU DO NOT LIKE THAT NASTY JB.
Or 2: What? hahahahahahahahahahaha. I do. I ate quite a few today and yesterday
H1's away message: People should keep their dirty secrets to themselves
Or 2: You know. You should support me during this difficult time. Ass.
H1: Support you? During what difficult time? The Popcorn JB incident? The OJ incident?
Or 2: yeah, the jellybeans...instead of telling me to keep dirty secrets to myself. I had the Dr. Pepper (flavoured jelly bean) yesterday. I was stunned.
H1: y?
Or 2: I wasn't expecting it. Then i wanted to dilute it in some water. I was thirsty.
H1: You know I don't understand you, having all these food misadventures in secret at your desk. You did not mention this once all the while. Some BFF you are.
Or 2: Well I only made the discovery today. I tasted the popcorn one once more to be certain
H1: suppose I wanted some JBs, ass. I could see you know nibbling shit at your desk behind all your paper. Secret JB eater. I thought we shared everything,even the nastiness. Oh grief.

Currently listening to: "Wet and Rusting" by Menomena.

New Blog Layout - For The Beginning of the New Year 2008

The slightly yellowed snowman remains for it is still winter after all. The black is back because since the season has just begun and with the start of the new year, we're feeling a little somber. Besides which, black is our favourite and our best.

Why the colour selection, you ask? I'm channeling my Rock Band character and her often not-that fantastic colour schematic clothing choices.

Rock it, Zarnyx!!!!

Whoooo!

Thank goodness for our band manager, H1, who has a better sense of style than I. Otherwise things would be looking a lot like a disaster and a ton more hot pink with red.

Currently listening to: "Rockers to Swallow" by Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

Happy 2008

What sort of adventures will we happen upon and create together this year?

Currently listening to: "New Year's Day" by U2.