The Dragon Boat Incident: Chapter II

We have gathered evidence to try to shed some light on the Dragon Boat Incident of 04/22/07.

A source, (reliable and unbiased, honestly!), sent us photographs of what really happened. The pictures do not lie.

Photographic Evidence 1, otherwise known as "The Happy, Pretty-Dry Times":



Please notice how the beloved Dragon Boat is just moving right along there - it's the sun, the sea, the sky and the Dragon Boat.

Photographic Evidence 2, referred to now as "What is that? The First Signs of Trouble? Is that Frantic Paddling and a Low Boat, maybe?":



Photographic Evidence 3, or the "That's Definite Trouble! The Man in Front isn't there anymore!" shot:



And finally, Photographic Evidence 4:



It looks a whole lot like this - We've crashed. We've burned. We've tilted, not capsized. We're not in any mortal danger and the water is clearly shallow enough that we can stand in it.

H1 and I don't see any Jack Bauerism type heroism going down, MC.

Nor do we see any hottie 18 year olds, Pandy.

Still, this story has been nominated for The HOchies 2007 award in "The Hal Hal Moment" of the year category.

The other entries are pending but it's only April. You betches are too hilarious to not give us anymore gems for the year.

This is going to be hard to top but we look forward to all your insanity.

The 2nd Nominee for Ass of the Year Award

Who knew that James Blunt was not only an asshole but a stupid one at that?

Who leaves a model (who lost her boyfriend in the Tsunami), first to skank it up with a fire crotch, and now for that crabby crotch disease monger?

A stupid asshole. That's who.

So far, The Nominees for Ass of the Year include ...

So Don Imus got the ax from CBS because he jokingly called the Rutgers female basketball team some "Nappy-Headed Hos". Way to go Stupid. Now, I am not saying that that was a smart thing to say, because it wasn't, but people have been saying all sorts of shit lately and Don Imus is the only ass who has had serious life-changing repercussions fall on him.

Let us compare the most recent shit talk.

A few months ago Isaiah Washington refered to his co-star T.R. Knight as a "Faggot". Hmmm... Isaiah apologized, made a big show of going to some sort of rehab, donated some money, is pretending that he is not a hateful ass but is still earning himself and that network mucho dinero because last time I checked Grey's anatomy was still in business with all of its cast intact. I guess it is okay to call someone a really awful derogatory name once it is not done in a jocular fashion because then THAT would be serious.

Now, let me rant about the other issues that the Imus incident has raised.

Firstly, Don Imus is now a major news headliner when he should just have been allowed to fade into obscurity as he was doing since noone really cared or knew about his foolish self before this.
Secondly, here are Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson riding in on their Black Horses to highlight their moral outrage on behalf of all Black people, especially their Black sisters. PLEASE, give me a freakin' break. First off, stop carrying on as if you speak for the Black community and secondly, stop trying to carry off all this moral bullshit when You, Jesse Jackson, Reverend, have all these illegitimate children out there and You, Al Sharpton, Reverend? or just likes to sound like one?, should talk more about your affinity for WHITE Prostitutes. Media Asses or Media Hos?
Thirdly, I really love how Jesse Jackson totally avoided the question posed by Meredith Viera about his reference to NYC as "HYMIETOWN". Oh no, not racist at all when you consider it was only Jews he was talking about in a serious derogatory manner.

Epiphany time. I guess it really is not a big deal when one speaks nastily about Homosexuals and Jews. After all, who cares about them?

Gosh, I am an angry Chinky Ho. But only I, and people of my racial descent can use that slur. Noone else.

I have to go to bed.

- H1

Again with the assholeness of mcr.

Beetchie and I saw the cover of this month's Spin Magazine the other night and noticed a quote pulled from an interview with my chemical romance (out of sheer disgust and disrespect for this 'band', I will no longer address them with capital letters) plastered on the cover. It read the following,

"Kids were killing themselves until they heard our music."

I am not lying. That is what we saw.

Beetchie's description of them as arrogant assholes is nothing short of fitting.

My response ...

I want to kill myself BECAUSE I heard your music.

Fuck you, mcr.