Crazy Bitches All in a Cage (Season 1: The 24 Head Count Continues)

8 PM to 9 PM:

Mitch *Connors* you were right! The assistant to Palmer is ho'ing around! Patty why you ho'ing around?!

Cat fight!Rrrrrrrrrrrreoooowwwwwww!!!!!

I would still beat Kim's ass down. That speech about her hard 24 hours was lame for the sole reason of "Bring it on". When I say that, it's hardcore. When she says it... :hurl:
And then, she gets beat down by a black girl. I mean, who wouldn't though? That bitch was no joke.

Jack's like his daughter. Either they get beat downs by black girls or Dennis Hopper. We're not sure exactly what accent the DH is trying to pull though... anyone care to fill us in?

Who I'd Like to See Dead in the Near Future - Ryan.

Head Count: 9. ::sniff:: the LDP, everyone puts you guys down.

9 PM to 10 PM:

I'm sorry but that pink suit is not very becoming of Sherry. Don't gun me down, Sherry! I was only kidding!

Oooooooooohhhhh...Palmer's ho'ing around now. With Patty. Ooooooooooooo.

Quotes on this:

"The hellatious thing is growing out of control. It's spreading!" - HOchie 1. Yep, that's what 22 hours of no shaving does to Tony A.

"What was that pansy slap?" - Me. It was just like that time TD5 *porn slapped* Mitch *Connors*. I remember it like it was 12 blogs ago...

"Now we know why Mitch *Connors* likes Sherry. Because Sherry provides a brother with sistas." - HOchie 1.

Head Count: 2

10 PM to 11 PM:

Dude, Palmer's so smart. He deserves to be President!
Sherry ain't got nothing on him...for now?

Honestly, how long do these phones ring for in this show? Sometimes I wonder if they set up voice mail at all.

Who Sherry Would Like to See Dead in the Near Future: Jack

Best Actor award in this episode: Tony, after he found out that Palmer was 'dead'. It reminded me of our Tony when his 'bike' was dead.

Head Count: 2. It's about time that stupid Alexis bit the dust. And I'll up it 2 because that phone got blasted and balcony window got blasted too... 0.5 a piece.

11 PM to 12 AM:

I figured it out! It's German! DH was supposed to have a German accent! Ok, so they actually said it was German, otherwise, I would not have known. Thanks for clearing it up guys.

And umm, where the heck is Milo?

Who Sherry Would Like to See Dead in the Near Future: David Palmer. And if I were Palmer, I wouldn't mess with that crazy bitch.

Head Count: 12. Poor dead Terri. A 2 in 1 is just wrong.

Hell Hath No Fury Like A Woman Misled: Season 1 (4 PM to 8 PM) The 24 Head Count Continues

4 PM to 5 PM -

Kim did something kind of smart but not so much - she wanted to talk to Jack and when she couldn't, she wanted to talk to Nina because she didn't trust Tony. Biatch, don't trust annyone especially that Nina! Now she's calling Rick. Stupid ass.

And it's confirmed that Elizabeth Nash is a stupid bitch but I guess we'd feel like an ass as well if we knew we were having an affair with the senator's would-be assassin.

And did Terri have an affair?! Ooooooooooooooooo.

Potentially Dead in the Near Future - Alexis.

Head Count - 0

5 PM to 6 PM:

The Har Har Moments: When Jack had to switch his bloody shirt out with some agent...why did that guy look really small compared to Jack? A perfect fit? A likely story...

Jack's a sensitive guy.

Disgusting Moments: Kim & Rick and Keith & Father.

Who I'd Like To See Dead in the Future: Teddy and Dan's Brother, Frank.

Head Count - 2

6 PM to 7 PM:

And once again, Kim is stupid.

Poor Nicole... best performance all season.

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, Tony saved Terri!!!! Too bad her ass is dead soon anyway. Just like Tony. Poor dead two of them.

Head Count - 3

7 PM to 8 PM:

Why did Jack just get toasted by Lou Diamond Phillips?

Quotes on this:

And why is LDP now taking orders from KS? - "Because he remembers his place from 'Young Guns'. No matter what the show, Keifer is always Mass'r." - HOchie 1.

"Who's the prisoner?! Is it Keifer's father?! Is it Donald?!" - Me.
"It's Dennis Hopper." - HOchie 1.
"Oh." - Me.

Head Count - 0

Fun Boy Is Not Having Any Fun... (Season 1: 12 PM to 4 PM)

When is Kim going to die? She's useless. I hope Season 6 sees her dead.

Anyway, the 24 Head Count continues -

12 PM to 1 PM:

Quotes on this:

"The Squirts are lost." - Me.
"You know why? That's because Nina gave them bad GPS coordinates." - HOchie 1.

Potential traitors - Nina.
Potential Whoring Around - Maureen & Senator Palmer.

Potentially dead in the near future - Rick

Headcount - 2. Poor dead Chinaman. He had a mortgage to pay and lots of children to feed.

And Fun Boy, definitely not having any fun. But why did I have to lose you twice in 12 years?

Fire it up, buddy. Fire it up.



1 PM to 2 PM:

Head Count - 5. Alan/Kevin. Dead.

2 PM to 3 PM:

Palmer does not want to sell insurance to Tony, that's for sure.

Who I'd Like To See Dead in the Near Future: That bitch who's sleeping with the new sniper. She is truly unnecessary. And stupid. Stupid bitches deserve to be a part of the head count.

Palmer certainly doesn't want to sell insurance to Bauer either. Ooo, Bauer doesn't want to buy any, so it works out.

Quotes on this:

"That's one gOOd lOOking safe house." - Me.
"And there's a pool. Looks pretty comfortable to me. I wish I had a safe house like that." - HOchie 1.

"Senator Palmer is more stupid than I thought." - HOchie 1.

Ahahahahaha, Alberta got shut down.

Head Count - 1. Bob deserved to die due to his sheer stupidity. Mitch *Connors* informs me Tony also deserved what he got due to the same reason but I'll be the judge of that when Season 5 comes around.

3 PM to 4 PM:

STOCKHOLM SYNDROME!!!!!!!!!!!!

Potentially Dead in the Near Future - Ugly Elizabeth Nash, the stupid 'I'm sleeping with the sniper' bitch

Head Count - 5. Why they always gotta put a black man down?!

Season 1: 8 AM to 12 PM

The 24 Head Count Continues:

8 AM to 9 AM - HOchie 1 and or 2 have dubbed this "The Hellatious Episode".

Quotes on this:

"Lauren, don't get too close! Think about the head count!!!" - Me.

"Lauren had a hellatious night and she's about to have a hellatious day. Just like Mitch *Connors* who's having a hellatious day at Cari-Fest." - HOchie 1.

"You should blog about Tony's hellatious triangle." - HOchie 1.
"Don't make fun of poor dead Tony's hellatious...chin...thing!" - Me.

Possibly dead in the near future - Jamie, Lauren & Kyle.

Head Count - 0.

9 AM to 10 AM

Quotes on this:

"You know this show is all about putting minorities in power, right?" - HOchie 1.

"I don't like this here sound effect... It's giving me anxiety." - HOchie 1, on the 24 clock countdown.

Possibly dead in the near future - Eli's cellphone & Eli, now that I think about it..., Mr. Cofell's limo driver Mark. Poor Mark...

Who I would like to see dead in the near future - Alberta Greene

Head Count - 1. Die Bitch, Die!

10 AM to 11 AM

Possibly dead in the near future - Ted Cofell, from a heart attack.

Who HOchie 1 would like to see dead in the near future - Carl

Quotes on this:

"You know who I never want to meet? Jack Bauer. Because everyone around him dies." - HOchie 1

"Carl should die just on the fact that he is ugly." - HOchie 1

Head Count - 2.

11 AM - 12 PM

Quotes on this:

"Everyone in this show needs life insurance." - Me
"Palmer will give it to them." - HOchie 1
"But isn't Progressive a Car Insurance company?" - Me
"Yeah but they have life insurance too." - HOchie 1

The Har Har Moment - Jack under the blanket

Head Count - 4 (?) but definitely 3.

Episodes left to watch - 108.