I'm not really keen on seeing it because there's some bitterness there from the childhood when our brother and I had our Tapes stolen from us but annnnyyywwaaaayyyyyy.
We came up with a plan for Battler and that is to have her dress up as a montage of vintage 80's cartoons at the premiere for this movie.
Here are some of the items she needs to be rockin' when the time comes - a smurf hat, a strawberry shortcake on the arm, a top cat top hat, and a chomp chomp in a bag among other things. But then I mentioned she needed some kind of "Captain Planet and the Planeteers" gear and we realized that that show was racist!
Think about it.
Why was the African kid the guardian of Earth?
Why was the Asian kid the guardian of Water?
Why was the Amazonian kid the guardian of Heart? Okay, maaayybbbe that's not racist but I just didn't understand it.
The European was the guardian of Wind but did anyone else notice that the Fire-Crotch was the guardian of Fire?
This show sucked big time but that's what happens when you let Hippies on to tv and let them create programs. That's right, Jane Fonda, I called you a GDDH.
Here's what sucked the most though:
one of the characters was called 'Duke Nukem' and looked a like so -
The only Duke Nukem we'd know and love is this one!
Alright, so maybe he was an asshole that we didn't necessarily love but at least he didn't invoke images of Magnum PI with his choice of attire.
Quotes of the week:
"I stayed there like a pussy!" - Battler, on her misadventures at the 14th Street Starbucks.
"Sabi has an ass-lock." - Beetchie, on the tuft of hair that Sabi refuses to have brushed out, that yes, is lingering above her ass and becoming dutty.
"When Sabi is ready to have it cut, she'll just back her ass up on Beetchie to have her cut it off." - H1, on above subject.
Hey man I hearted those planteers, even that weird fez kid and his annoying monkey. Um. That sounded wrong, but whatev! Plus you gotta admit Captain planet rocked that uh "white boy" flat top like nobodies bidniss.
ReplyDelete"Captain planet,he's a hero!
He's here to take pollution down to a zero!"
Yeah, you would heart the planeteers. But you know, as much as I betch about them, I remember watching that show religiously.
ReplyDeleteYeah, Ma-ti did remind me of Fez or Diego because I am racist. Captain Planet taught me how.
duke nuke'em --oh shiiiiit. oh shiiiiiiiiiiiit. losin. my. fun.lovin.mind. yr a magician. pullin awesomness out of yr ass hat like that.
ReplyDeleteoh, the sabi quote. all i could thing off was "back that ass up"
the amazon was the guardian of heart cuz everyone knows amazonians eat baboon hearts, which give them magical powers and shit.
me: not wearin a smurf hat
LONG LIVE OPTIMUS PRIME
Ahahahahahahaha, Baboon hearts! Sometimes I think I'm Amazonian.
ReplyDeleteI already knitted you a smurf hat, so smurf hat you will wear.
yea, and im a chinese jet pilot
ReplyDelete