"The Mother-Fookin' Cornerstone"

Sadly, I did not get to meet Nick at the Mother-Fookin' Cornerstone, and hell, I was barely able to see him from where I stood.

One day perhaps.

In the meanwhile, the real arctic monkeys went to see Arctic Monkeys the band.

The lot of us who stood outside that Cornerstone, that is literally on the corner of 11th and the West Side Highway, were freezing.

Calling Friday night 'cold ass' is an understatement.  It was the first cold blast we got for the season/month and of course, it had to happen whilst H1 and I had plans to be in the middle of nowhere.

I cannot stress how much I dislike Terminal 5 but I'll go ahead and say it again.

The Low-lamps:

1.  Terminal 5.  What the hell... Summer or Winter, it's a bad venue.  Terminal 5 secured a bout of NINfluenza thanks to poor ventilation back in August and last night? No heat! The only time it got hot was when those damned ukkers were farting on me.

2. Ukkers.  Beer-drinking Ukkers.  Rude, Hooligan Beer-drinking Ukkers.  Rude, Hooligan Beer-drinking Ukkers who fart without hesitation or apology reminiscent of Stinky, Beer-drinking Japanese men who sit on a 14 hour flight with a poor unsuspecting girl while her ass friend is oblivious to it all because she is too busy sleeping near the window.

3.  American children.  For some reason, the already young crowd for Arctic Monkeys seemed much younger.  We're not sure why or how they heard this is one of the best bands ever but there they were at Terminal 5 last night and it was embarrassing.  Being a bit of an elitist, I'm not sure why they like Arctic Monkeys because I don't think they're clever enough to keep with Alex's brilliant lyrics.  It boggles the mind, really.

4.  NJ.  More specifically (though need I say more?) Screaming Females.  Arctic Monkeys continues to pick losers for opening acts.  Okay, so Modey Lemon last AM concert were really good live (but note, not so much on disc).  And maybe Screaming Females was not as bad as say B.Y.O.P. but nothing is worse than that other than Seether.  However, Screaming Females need to tighten what they're doing.  As H1 rightly said, the female lead needs to give up writing songs and singing them.  She can keep playing guitar because she's a decent player but other than that, she's keeping the band of rats from getting out of the Bridge and Tunnel.  Also, they need to pick a genre and go with it because they 'sample' way too many and rip off way too many other songs from other bands.

5. Remember Fucking Albert Chung ? Well here we have Fucking Alexa Chung.  When will Alex be smart as we know him to be and ditch that bitch.  She was there last night being an annoyance to my senses.  It was bad enough she was dressed like a hipster, but then she had to act like one too.  And anyone who's got the blood of weople and asians just do not have a chance at being able to dance.  Oh lork, it was like Diddy all over again.  You really have to wonder what people hear when there's a beat to a song.  Rhythm? What's that? More mind boggling stuff, really.

6.  The set list.  Why did we get the exact same set list as the night before? Alex apologised but it's not enough! You couldn't even play "Catapult"?! Or one song different?! Not right, boys.  Lazy!

7.  The sound.  What happened? I've come to realise that every Arctic concert comes with technical difficulties.  But last night was the worst - I can deal with the cutting off of sounds because great banter usually follows but everything sounded as though it was in a vaccum.  While Matthew's drumming just took over everything which to me is not a bad thing being he's the best, we could barely hear Alex at the start.  Who knows where Nick's and The Cookie's sound got to.  I could blame Terminal 5 but having heard NIN there, that'd be a straight out untruth.

8.  "My Propellor".  No, that wasn't my song, H1.  "Red Right Hand" was my song.

9.  My crap photos. Well, I could barely see the stage to begin with (save The Cookie, who I never want to see...he scares the shit out of me), much less get good photos for a band I never get good photos of.

The Highlights:

1.  "Last Christmas" as performed by Matthew Helders.  It.  was.  frickin'.  h-i-l-a-r-i-o-u-s.  And he sounded good.  And it made me enjoy "Fluorescent Adolescent" even more that I usually do (I'm not the biggest fan of that song, it's true).  That performance was nothing short of classic - it involved a stool, shades and an afro sported by my favourite drummer.  That was one of the finer concert moments I've had.



2.  Nick.  I may not have seen him a lot thanks to assholes who shoved their way in front of me but when I did, I felt really happy.  Too bad after all the times I've seen AM, I only now pay attention to him especially since I was right in his face back in August.  Even then when things were quiet then, I wanted shout out to Matthew.  Awww, Nick.  You're my new favourite.  I love how you handle the bass as if it's too awkward for you and you've anything but a bassist cool stance.  It's quite comical watching you play, actually but it's endearing.  And you're a good bassist. 

But please, cut your hair or do something with it.  That goes for the rest of you guys as well.  Except maybe Helders and his 'fro.  I'm liking how funny THAT mess is.

3.  Matthew Helders - the Agile Beast.  He continues to impress, that one.

4.  "Sketchead".  I was really hoping for "Catapult" but this was good too.

5.  Alex.  He couldn't see me, so it was the first time he missed Suga'Face although he may have glanced briefly in my direction.  Ahahaha.  Ah but I was more concerned I couldn't see my bassist. 

6.  For the first time since I've seen them, AM managed to riff new sounds into their set.  They changed up their songs to extended versions with different elements of the guitars and bass and it was fun.  They're comfortable enough now to do that and it was most welcome.

7. H1 and my Imaginary Friend Fred were both there.  Ooo, and H1 finally got to hear "505" and it sounded much better than it did at the Highline Ballroom (save that one screeching bit of the mic).  I've yet to tell TD5 that he may have gotten to hear it first but his sucked compared to H1's experience.

8.  While not the greatest technical sounding show, Arctics blended old with new even better than at Highline.  It was more fun even though the Highline show was great for the first live run of the new album.  Playing "The Jeweller's Hand" to start made the show interesting but mostly dull and I feared another desert experience as back in August but with that out of the way, the rest of the songs were more well-balanced and more frantic, making this show an overall success and not as mellow even if the crowd energy seemed pathetic.

In a way, this show is probably the worst I've seen of them but that's due to the lack of first album material (alright, that bus has come and gone - as someone put it, but those will always be my most fun memories) and the sound (and of course, the venue) but is in no way a reflection of their skills.  They really have come quite a ways, my boys.  I think I might always feel a twinge of sadness that they've matured so much.

9.  Who knew Harry Potter was a member of Screaming Females? And he plays drums!

10. No "Dangerous Animals".  Thank.  GOODNESS.  I 'boring' that song with a passion.

11. The usual banter, and our Number 1 Roadie giving us such great moments as ....

Memorable Quotes and Moments of the Evening:

Alex: New York, this house is a circus.  An observation and an introduction. (he lies of course..there was no circus.  The crowd pretty much sucked).

Alex: I apologise for the same set but I am wearing different boots.  We hope no one's been telling our secret from last night to you folks tonight.  ::and then into "Fluorescent Adolescent" with Matthew's "Last Christmas".::

Alex: Are you feeling good tonight? Of course you are, unlike last night, you've got Friday behind you.

Alex: ::singing:: At the mother-fooking cornerstone...

Matthew's drumstick broke and he threw it in front of him and it fell near Alex.  The number 1 Roadie walked on stage, picked it up complete with being deadpan in the face as he usually is, and threw it right back at Matthew.

The Arctic Monkeys at Terminal 5, NYC on 12/11/2009 Set list:

1.  The Jeweller's Hands
2.  Brianstorm
3.  This House is a Circus
4.  Still Take You Home
5.  Potion Approaching
6.  Red Right Hand (Nick Cave cover)
7.  My Propeller
8.  Crying Lightning
9.  Sketchead
10. I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor
11. The View from the Afternoon
12. Cornerstone
13. If You Were There, Beware
14. Pretty Visitors
15. Do Me a Favour
16. Fluorescent Adolescent with Last Christmas (Wham Cover by Matthew Helders)

Encore:

17. Secret Door
18. 505


Currently listening to: "This House is a Circus" and "Catapult" by Arctic Monkeys.

Message for A.T.

Dear Alex,

"505" or chicken bones collected since August 4th?

Your choice.

Regards,

H1

Fuckin' Up The Lyrics with The Last Shadow Puppets

I ordered the tickets to see The Last Shadow Puppets back in July and I was super excited at the time to be seeing the boys Miles and Alex, after really loving their album The Age of the Understatement.

Yesterday, however, I was so damned cranky that I almost did not go.

Everything just seemed to be going wrong and if not for the price per ticket, I would have bailed, even if it meant giving up a chance to see my cutie Alex and my cool Miles.

Thank goodness I stayed because they were even more incredible than I thought they'd be.

Having a 16 piece orchestra will do that for you and the sound at small venue of the Grand Ballroom just filled it and was absolutely amazing.



The Lowlamps:

1. Those damned privileged children. They were complaining about 'wanting weekends' when they only work 2 days out of the week. They also had the nerve to say, "My friends lost their jobs but I just got a job. They're jobs out there." I am thankful that X kneed and elbowed a few of them for being stupid assholes.

2. The lighting at that damned place. Just like the Hammerstein downstairs, I still have yet to take a great picture of Alex.

3. My camera. I love Little Latin O. for its years of service, but in a setting like that, it tends to fail me and I get annoyed when people managed to smuggle in their D40s or had better slim point & shoots and just take damned good pictures! GRRRR!

4. H1 not being able to be there too, especially during Arctic Monkey/The Rascals like moments.

5. Miles Kane's dressing up like a Gallagher. I know X was happy but I avoided eye contact with her when I saw Miles come out with his aviators, leather jacket and very British looking face. Oh Miles. Did you HAVE to work against me?!



6. My Mistakes Were Made For You. Alex didn't do a very good job singing this song. It's probably the best song on the album and he was effed it. Thanks A., Thanks.

7. Our initially poor attitudes. X and I were so damned cranky, we almost left. It's not our fault though because those bastards started half an hour later than they were supposed to and the Roadies just stood around pretending to do work.

8. The Roadies. There was this neanderthal that scared the crap out of X and myself. He looked like he would kick our asses.



9. The opening act, Stephen Fretwell. The one thing we hated about him was the lyrics he wrote that actually made sense. He sang two songs that were normal and we were damned bored. He needs to stick to what he knows, which is the bizarre and... chickens?

The Highlights:

1. The opening act, Stephen Fretwell. Okay, he was funny but his chicken in the supermarket lyrics, tree roots and by tree roots he means himself, and other nonsensical lyrics were damned confusing making X and I marvel at being able to witness what just waking up can do to a singer. He had a good voice and a sense of humour but the performance made us laugh the whole way through until the last 2 songs mentioned.

The video's sideways but uh, what's he going on about?



Hilarious.

2. The 16 piece orchestra. Those effers took long to setup and fiddle with their violins but they did a good job.

3. Miles Kane. I was hesitant at first when I first heard that Alex and Miles were going to form a band and write songs with influences of Scott Walker and David Bowie. I was skeptical it took them 2 weeks in a bed bug ridden villa in France to write the album and then I was skeptical when the video for The Age of the Understatement premiered. Then I decided to give it more time to simmer because lyrically it was to be expected from Alex that it'd be awesomely mature and well-written. And then I thought... Miles is 'firm friends' with Alex, so he must be a brilliant boy as well.

So after buying this album, I respected Miles and thought he was cool enough to have a crush on another Brit. Then, I bought The Rascals' album, "Rascalize" and I knew it was really okay to have a crush on Miles. It was rock, 60s, 'hard' and fun and Miles carried it brilliantly.

Last night was no different and I'm glad I got to see him perform and would totally see him for The Rascals if they ever came to NYC. He was awesome, he smiled for photographers and looked at crazy Cherries warily. I didn't enjoy that he didn't look at me but he was distracted by those asshole children who were acting a damned mess, even if I was standing right in front of him. I can't blame him.



7. My Moment with Alex Turner. I had another one with him - my third in a year and half. X and I were standing on Miles' side, but from where I stood I got a clear shot of Alex and he of me. During "Calm Like You" (one of my favourite songs), he sang the first half to me. Yep. He stared straight at me and sang. I sang it back to him and smiled.
Now, there are probably various reasons why he did this.

a. He was probably thinking, "oh, there's Suga'Face".
b. He was probably thinking, "oh, there's Suga'Face but where's her Sister Suga'Face?"
c. He was probably thinking, "oh, there's that...girl, who...I think I see everytime I'm in NYC...is she stalking me?"
d. He was probably thinking, "oh, that girl reminds me of my gf (BITCH! - okay, that's my own insert and probably not his)..."

It was actually a really sweet moment and I could do nothing but sing and smile at him because he was extra cute last night, which leads me to believe it was choice "D", which makes me cranky but I botched it anyway when I messed up a lyric and he caught it. He turned away after that. Ha. He did look at me again during "Standing Next to Me" but that was brief. He probably remembered I messed up the first time... Curses! And so that was 'fuckin' up the lyrics with TLSP' Part I.

8. Alex Turner. It's good to see he's getting cuter as years go by because I was a little worried for him for a while there. However, he's looking a lot less hooliganish and well, that's just not right.



9. Miles and Alex. Their banter was cute. Alex smiled a lot with his BFF and they were quite happy with each other. It's the kind of happy you'd probably see if you were to hang out with them while they talked about bullshit, which they did a lot of last night. Poor Miles, unlike Alex's fun day in NYC, Miles was feeling under the weather.



10. Separate and Ever Deadly - 'fuckin' up the lyrics' with TLSP Part II. Yeah, when Miles had to sing his verse, I totally heard him stumble and begin late. As I was about to point this out to him and well, to X, really. Miles stopped the orchestra so he could do it over. "Wait! I fucked it up! I started late! Fucked it up!!!! I want to do it again because it's good!" And so he did and it was good.

Ah, funny effs.

The Last Shadow Puppets Set List 10/30/2008 @ the Grand Ballroom NYC:

In My Room
The Age of the Understatement
Calm Like You
Black Plant
Gas Dance
Only the Truth
Separate and Ever Deadly
My Little Red Book
Standing Next To Me
Hang the Cyst
I Want You (She's So Heavy) (The Beatles cover)
In The Heat of the Morning (David Bowie cover)
I Don't Like You Anymore
My Mistakes Were Made For You
The Chamber
The Time Has Come Again
Meeting Place

Best performances of the evening: "Calm Like You", "Only the Truth", "Separate and Ever Deadly", "Hang the Cyst", "I Want You (She's So Heavy)"

I Am In So Much Trouble

H1, don't kill me, okay?

The Last Shadow Puppets - Live In Brooklyn

Alex Turner & Miles Kane are in New York promoting their forthcoming debut album as The Last Shadow Puppets. A very special acoustic performance has been added to their schedule as a treat for NY area fans!

When: Tomorrow, Tuesday March 4, at approx. 10 PM. Doors @ 9:45, please try not to show up before then. A line will start outside before the doors open.
Where: Soundfix Records, 110 Bedford Ave, Brooklyn, NY (Bedford & N. 11th) - Bedford L-train stop / Williamsburg, Brooklyn
How: Just show up, it's free. All ages, no tickets required.
Please do NOT call Sound Fix for details.

Heh. Heh. I got that notice yesterday but didn't realize until this morning. Apparently only 100 people showed up and Alex and Kane took pics with everyone and hung out for a bit.

...

My 2nd husband avoids me again.

I remain poor. And now, poor with forthcoming bruises.

Currently listening to: "S.T.A.R. Game" by Koji Kondo and Toru Minegishi, from The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess Soundtrack

Also, on a side note, I fear all the smaller acts that I want to see in concert will take their gigs to Brooklyn. Everyone's all over that place these days. I can't set foot there unless Beetchie's with me, though perhaps I should mull over what I said... I did almost die there the last time when we were together.

Depressed

We cannot believe our boy Alex was walking around in the crowd and we did not see him!!!!!!

Argggghhh!!!!!!!

If Only I Had Thought This Through and Planned Accordingly...

The HOchies should be in Manchester this weekend with all the lot of hooligans and such.

You know this weekend is going to go down in AM history as fan-fookin'-tabulous.

We're missing the band that put out the greatest album of the year thus far, as they put on their biggest gig yet.

We're missing those clowns - The Cookie, Nick and my other favourite, Matthew.

And most importantly, we're missing THIS beautiful boy:



Consider The HOchies now officially depressed.

Ready The Popeye's!

The rest of our summer into fall is turning out to be a little bit busy.

There are potential chicken bone incidents to dole out, so let us begin this consolidated post.

A Warning to Cold War Kids:

Listen, CWK. I am not in love with your album. I can appreciate it's originality though. There are some great tracks on there and the story-telling element is fantastic. However, due to your supposed lack of respect of MUSE and your utmost adoration of The White Stripes, I am a little resentful. I hope you realize you're opening for one of the greatest bands in the world by opening for MUSE @ MSG.

While you may think that being asked by the White Stripes to open for them on their tour is an honour, quite frankly, I think Jack White is overrated. He should stop being hailed as a god because he's far from it.

He's a stupid ass.

My warning to you is that I want you to perform "Electioneering". While you may have bastardized Radiohead some, I can understand that it's hard to cover Radiohead. It may even be virtually impossible, actually. That is of course, unless you're Mindless Self Indulgence then most things you touch become gold. Hmm, maybe I should write MSI. Anyway, I digress. As I was saying, even though you bastardized it some, you did the best you could and it didn't turn out THAT bad. So, I'd kind of like to hear it.

Redeem yourselves some and then maybe you'll get fewer chicken bones to the head but just know they're coming regardless.

Not a Whole Lotta Love,

Or 2.

A Warning To MUSE:

To my beloved Matt, my funny-assed Dom and that other guy...ahaha, I keed and Chris,

Boys, boys, boys. I love you so much. It's really hard for me to issue a warning to you but I feel that I must.

I've seen you 3 times for this album. Everytime I saw you, I was amazed by your brilliance but you know what didn't amaze me? The fact that you insisted on screwing me over by not playing "Muscle Museum". I've had enough of your bullshit.

You bitches best be playing that song or else there'll be a barrage of chicken bones. I'm already collecting them because I fear that if I didn't hear it at Wembley Fuckin' Stadium, then there's no hope for me.

And I hate you for it.

Please boys, this will probably be the last time I see you for this tour until the new album.

Don't make me cry.

Love you lots,

Or 2.

A Warning to Alex Turner II:

Dear loveable Alex Turner,

It was great seeing Arctic Monkeys back in May. That was really fun times and I was very upset when I didn't get to go to Malahide but oo! Perhaps there'll be muddy fun at Central Park's Summerstage on September 5th just like there was at Malahide Castle?! Well, I sure hope for no mud but ahhh, the greatness that will be that pit, which makes me really scared actually.

In any event, H1's super excited to be seeing "the little boy she's having dirty thoughts about". That's just wrong, H1. I loved him first but no worries. Anyway, the point of all of this is that H1's issuing you another warning.

Apparently you will get a chicken bone to nose (and she's confident she won't miss - yes, she continues to keed) if you do not sing "505". Stop...and wait a sec. Think about it, Alex. Think about it.

Sincerely,

Or 2 (kind of on behalf of H1).

P.S. Don't hate me, the messenger.

A Warning to Paul Banks II:

Hello Paul Friend.

I'm falling in love with that voice of yours. It's sort of sexy and dirty.

But please be aware that you will no longer be my friend if Interpol does not perform "All Fired Up".

Loving me some of you these days,

Or 2.

A Warning To J.K Rowling:

Bitch, if we get tickets to see you at Carnegie Hall on October 19th, you are so assed out. There'll be 2 chicken bones for every death in the last installment of Harry Potter and if Ron dies, there'll be 7 buckets of the stuff.

- H1, backed up by Or 2.

Currently listening to: Beetchie on the phone. She interrupted the MUSE I was listening to. Pox on her.

We Hate Him This Week

But I could still love and live with this:



And oh, do we love him.

Also, I love Matthew because he slays me.

Seriously, How Could Anyone Not Lov' Alex Turner?

photo source: www.NME.com

It's Been A Week

And we're still re-living the goo'd times we had at Arctic Monkeys. This time last week, we were anxiously awaiting our boys to take the stage.

I'm not writing this to torture TD5. I'm actually just writing this because I forgot to say a few things.

1. Frass, you should consider yourself priviledged to be at that show! Apparently it sold out in 45 seconds. Again, not our fault you weren't prepared.

2. I had a surreal moment at the concert that I failed to mention the last time. Near the end of the set, Alex was fiddling with his guitar and looked up in my general direction. Then he did a double-take as if he had recognized me. He stared for a while. It was weird.
So I can think of only a few things,

a. He didn't want me taking footage?
b. I reminded him of that relationship he had to break off and writes about.
c. I'm Suga'Face and he realized it.

I'm really hoping for option c. because umm, b. is not the look I'm going for...

If You Found This, It's Probably Too Late

Under constant correction,
A fraud,
A fraud,
Someone's perception, trying not to bore
I'm a cold-hearted kidda,
Applaud
Applaud
If you're the highest bidder, I'm yours

You figure out pathetic sets
And We're not sure of the etiquette
We think out pathetic sets
We're not sure of the etiquette

And if you found this it's probably too late
Clinically cynical, hereditary hate...

...If we concentrate on being off the cuff
Not sure we're ready but probably rough
Frightened that honesty isn't enough
And it's nothing on the early stuff

- "If You Found This, It's Probably Too Late" by Arctic Monkeys

My Love-Hate relationship with Arctic Monkeys has ended.

Those assholes may have killed at least two Ipods that I know of (one being mine), and I may have slightly flamed them in the past by saying they were not to be taken too seriously but 7 months ago I was CLEARLY "fuckin' mental" (said in my best Yorkshire/Sheffield (?) accent). And highly unstable.

This band has fast become one of my favourites. I retract any ill I may have spoken of them in the past.

"Tonight there'll be some love. Tonight there'll be some rawkus regardless of what's come before."

And goddamn it, do we love those Ukkers.

And when my cutie Alex Turner says "don't believe the hype", I think I partially understand why...

May 15th, 2007

I'm sitting here trying to write a really fantastic blog entry about events on the above mentioned date but I really don't know how to begin addressing the topic at hand.

I could start by saying that my dilemma may be partially due to the fact that I'm really quite tired and beaten up. I'm in so much pain that I may have to take another pain killer in the morning.

H1's full of bruises from being the bad-ass that H1 only knows how to be by fighting betches off me left, back and right.

I'm hurting from fighting off betches off me from the left, front and right of me.

My neck aches from taking video footage. Why and how is that possible? Straining to see your camera screen above a crowd of jumping, moshing crazies as you hold it high above your head is tough work.

It also didn't help that my head was going back and forth from dancing (no, no dutty whiplash) and continues to do so even though I'm now 24 hours out of the Hammerstein Ballroom.

Our feet ache from standing way too long (which is a bitch when the opening act is Be Your Own Pet and they're so ass that even the Vibe magazine bought to pacify Frass becomes not only his saviour but yours as well. One long song disguised as nine is just god awful especially when your lead 'singer' is a female who cannot dance and H1 phrased it best when she said, "If Pulp Fiction didn't come out, this bitch wouldn't know what to do. She thinks she's Uma Thurman." And to answer your question, H1 - be thankful for small mercies that her hair was in her face the whole time because apparently trolls abound these days), jumping around to music you just can't help but jump around to and then racing along subway platforms to catch an 11.10 p.m. train home.

Another thing I can talk about is the fact that I had to elbow some asshole child who insisted I put my arms down because they were digging into her back. Well, asshole child, if you didn't push me out of my spot, or if you didn't actually take up someone's spot on the dancefloor by disregarding your mezzanine ticket purchases, then we wouldn't have a problem, would we?

Or how about the time I cut up the kids with X's Christmas present? Ah, we knew that ring would really be put to good use one day.

All that sounds awfully violent and should all be included in this blog but you'd swear we had a horrid night, yeah?

No.



Arctic Monkeys gave us one of the best concert experiences eva'!

Arctic Monkeys 05/15/07 @ Hammerstein Ballroom "Favourite Worst Nightmare" Tour Set List:

If You Found This, It's Probably Too Late
Brianstorm
Still Take You Home
Dancing Shoes
Balaclava
Fake Tales of San Francisco
Teddy Picker
You Probably Couldn't See For The Lights But You Were Staring Straight At Me
D is For Dangerous
I Bet That You Look Good on the Dancefloor
This House Is A Circus
If You Were There, Beware
From The Ritz to the Rubble
Old Yellow Bricks
Fluorescent Adolescence
Do Me A Favour
The View From The Afternoon
When The Sun Goes Down
Leave Before The Lights Come On
A Certain Romance

(note - they played all these songs but in between 'Dancing Shoes' and 'The View From the Afternoon', the actual order may be slightly off) - (Oh yeah, and notice there was no need for a Chicken Bone incident. Phew. I really didn't want to see H1 attack my boy and his nose)

Grievances of the Night:

1. Be Your Own Pet

2. All the Asshole Kids Mentioned Before

3. Getting pushed out of the pit - too far back to see Arctic Monkeys in all their glory playing their set. I'm really bummed I didn't get to see Matthew tear it up on drums.

4. Getting pushed out of the pit - too far to take any good pictures of the band due to their dark stage lighting. Damn it!

5. Not having Beetchie there to tear up the pit.

6. Having time fly by so quickly once our boys took the stage because of the fun, and fast-paced, great times of their performance.

7. My Hammer and Sickle pin got tossed off my bag and is now doing one of three things - a. floating around in Hammerstein Ballroom Hell lost forever, b. stuck under someone's shoe and then lost somewhere on 34th street and beyond or c. was stolen by one of the asshole kids who's blogging about it right now.

WTF Moments of the Night:

1. The Opening Act: Be Your Own Pet with special mention to that asshole Max, was it? The shirtless ass who did nothing but act a fool on stage. He's the kind of guy who's the '4th' useless member of the band. The one who has no talent so he sits around sucking the life out of the real members, who also happen to have no talent. Bad Combination + Bad Combination = Be Your Own Pet. I'll give small props to their drummer though. He actually worked.

2. No "Red Light Indicates Doors Are Secured"? WTF, Arctic Monkeys?! That's just wrong. I can almost forgive you boys for no "Perhaps Vampires Is a Bit Strong But..." too. Almost.

3. "Fake Tales of San Francisco"?! Ugh. Okay, so it was good in concert and singing "I don't want to hear you, kick me out" was pretty fun but still.

4. Finding out AFTER the concert that I could adjust my ISO on the camera to enhance the camera's ability to take better quality pictures when conditions make for poorly lit areas. That's more a 'fuckity-fuck-fuck' moment, really.

Fun Times of the Night:

1. Be Your Own Pet's guitarist's incident with the floor. When he tried to crowd surf and he hit the ground because they refused to hold him, THAT was the most single hilarious thing.

2. The fact that H1 was with me for this. It's been a while since we've been to a concert together. Goo'd times.

3. The insanity of the crowd during "Brianstorm".

4. The bassist, Nick O' Malley who actually didn't lose weight but is kind of an entirely different person. Heh Heh.



5. Jamie Cook(ie). Ah, the Cookie.



6. Matthew Helders. My favourite drummer and backing vocalist!



7. Trying to decipher Alex's accent. The fact that he spoke to us so much was fun too. "Boring, Boring. Yawn. Yawn." , "You've been very kind to us. Very kind." and "I'm very fond of New York" were all some of the cute quotes I could actually understand.
Did we mention we're in love with that clever little boy? Stop judging! 21's legal last I checked.

8. Alex's dancing.

9. And of course, Alex Turner himself. The brilliant lyricist with vocals unique. He really is just too damned adorable a boy, that. Annnnnddd I got no good pictures of him (and I really, really tried). Fuckity-Fuck-Fuck!





...about that hype: Disregard all the accolade you hear through the media. Listen for yourself because they're making music for themselves, for us and not the Vampires.

And like The HOchieS, you'll probably discover one of the most fantastic fuckin' bands to date.

I partially understand the statement because I'm sorry Arctic Monkeys, there is no unwarranted hype.

Currently listening to: All 53 songs (on random) I have belonging to them and ending this entry with "If You Were There, Beware" by Arctic Monkeys.

And stupidly bopping my head making my neck continue its ballistic insane pain.

Memorable Quotes of the Night:

"Akon Alert!" - H1, on Concert Security hitting on the 15 year olds.

"X is an ass." - Or 2, on X thinking she's too 'old' to be at this concert.

A Warning To Alex Turner

The concert is very soon! Just about one week away and the plan is to create a new tradition. The last time we were at the Hammerstein, we had Popeye's Chicken before the show and as we all know that show was Matisyahu, and the only good thing about that night was the chicken.

Well, we expect Arctic Monkeys will be better than the chicken but we started something we'd like to continue. The plan then, is to get Fraas to have chicken waiting for us when we get there. A pre-show feast, if you will.

However, in typical H1 fashion, I present to you a warning to Alex Turner.

Notes: **indicates disclaimers

H1: If Arctic Monkeys doesn't perform "Old Yellow Bricks", I will toss a chicken bone at Alex Turner.

Or 2: What?! Toss it at the bassist! (** in the event Nick O'Malley reads this ever, I heart you too, really I do!)

H1: Nope. I'll toss it at that big nose of his. (** in the event Alex Turner ever reads this, she didn't mean it.)

Or 2: Awww. Don't make fun of him and his nose...

And the conversation continued later that night

Or 2: do you like my new picture of Alex? (**it's a profile pic. on GChat so it's relatively small)



H1: are those muscles?

Or 2: yep

H1: well, they don't make his nose look so big

Or 2: ...
It just means if you toss a chicken bone at him, he could probably go hooligan on you.

H1: oh no
oh no

Or 2: that's how he got those muscles in the first place

H1: he will get cut

Or 2: by hooligan-ing

H1: I have Frass with me

Or 2: I'm fairly certain Alex could take out Frass

H1: yes but not before he gets cut. I will throw Frass under the bus to hear "Old Yellow Bricks".

Or 2: Hahahahahahahahahaha

H1: I'll have Fraas collect up a heap of chicken bones to throw at Alex Turner. And if the biscuit isn't very good, he could throw that as well.

Or 2: What about the mystery meat rice?

H1: No! Can't make good mystery meat rice go to waste! What is wrong with you?!

That's It.

I am in love with Alex Turner.

Currently listening to: Favourite Worst Nightmare by Arctic Monkeys.

I Need To Lay Off The Hooligans!

He's young* but I like him.



That's right, he's another ugly Brit. Uh, not that Matt's an ugly Brit. That's not what I meant! Nor is Alex, really! He's a cutie.

*note: I swear I'm not pulling an MC.

Currently listening to: "Bigger Boys and Stolen Sweethearts" by Arctic Monkeys. I hope I don't get screwed over in May because I'm really excited right now. TD5! A.M. in NYC May (I'm guessing) and MUSE @ WS in June! Saweeet! Oh yeah, I meant to tell you that LCD Soundsystem will be here sometime too. April, I think it was. But who cares about that?